Books: Old Rose and Silver
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Myrtle Reed >> Old Rose and Silver
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And yet, through woman's eager trustfulness, the man who opens the door
is not always the one divinely appointed to open it. Sometimes the light
fails and the woman, weeping in the darkness, is left alone in her
profaned temple, never to open its door again, or, after many years, to
set another light high upon the altar, and, in the deepening shadows,
pray.
So, because the door had never been opened, and because she knew the man
had come at last who might enter the sanctuary with her, Rose lifted her
ever-burning light that night to the high altar of her soul, and set
herself to wait until he should find his way there.
VII
FATHER AND SON
The house seemed very quiet, though steadily, from a distant upper room,
came the sound of a violin. For more than an hour, Allison had worked
continuously at one difficult phrase. Colonel Kent smiled whimsically as
he sat in the library, thinking that, by this time, he could almost play
it himself.
Looking back over the thirty years, he could see where he had made
mistakes in moulding the human clay entrusted to his care, yet, in the
end, the mistakes had not mattered. Back in the beginning, he had
formulated certain cherished ideals for his son, and had worked steadily
toward them, unmindful of occasional difficulties and even failures.
Against his own judgment, he had yielded to Francesca in the choice of
the boy's career. "Look at his hands," she had said. "You couldn't put
hands like his at work in an office. If he isn't meant for music, we'll
find it out soon enough."
But Allison had gone on, happily, along the chosen path, with never a
question or doubt of his ultimate success. Just now, the Colonel was
deeply grateful to Francesca, for the years abroad had been pleasant
ones, and would have been wholly impossible had Allison been working in
an office.
With a sigh, he began to pace back and forth through the hall, his hands
in his pockets, and his grey head bowed. Before him was his own
portrait, in uniform, his hand upon his sword. The sword itself, hanging
in a corner of the hall, was dull and lifeless now. He had a curious
sense that his work was done.
The tiny stream, rising from some cool pool among the mountains, is not
unlike man's own beginning, for, at first, it gives no hint of its
boundless possibilities. Grown to a river, taking to itself the water
from a thousand secret channels, it leaps down the mountain, heedless of
rocky barriers, with all the joy of lusty youth.
The river itself portrays humanity precisely, with its tortuous
windings, its accumulation of driftwood, its unsuspected depths, and its
crystalline shallows, singing in the Summer sun. Barriers may be built
across its path, but they bring only power, as the conquering of an
obstacle is always sure to do. Sometimes when the rocks and stone-clad
hills loom large ahead, and eternity itself would be needed to carve a
passage, there is an easy way around. The discovery of it makes the
river sing with gladness and turns the murmurous deeps to living water,
bright with ripples and foam.
Ultimately, too, in spite of rocks and driftwood, of endless seeking for
a path, of tempestuous nights and days of ice and snow, man and the
river reach the eternal sea, to be merged forever with the Everlasting.
Upstairs the music ceased. A door opened, then closed, and presently
Allison came down, rubbing his hands. "It's a little cool up there," he
said, "and yet, by the calendar, it's Spring. I wish this climate could
be averaged up."
"Even then, we wouldn't be satisfied," the Colonel returned. "Who wants
all his days to be alike?"
"Nobody. Still, it's a bit trying to freeze your nose one day and be
obliged to keep all the windows open the next."
There was a long pause. The Colonel tapped his fingers restlessly upon
the library table. Allison went over to the open fire and stood with his
back to it, clasping his hands behind him. "What have you been doing all
the morning, Dad?"
"Nothing. Just sitting here, thinking."
"Pretty hopeless occupation unless you have something in particular to
think about."
"It's better to have nothing to think about than to be obliged to think
of something unpleasant, isn't it?"
"I don't know," Allison responded, smothering a yawn. "Almost anything
is better than being bored."
"You're not bored, are you?" asked the Colonel, quickly.
"Far from it, but I have my work. I was thinking of you."
"I can work, too," the Colonel replied. "I think as soon as the ground
thaws out, I'll make a garden. A floral catalogue came yesterday and the
pictures are very inspiring."
"Does it give any directions for distinguishing between the flowers and
weeds?"
"No," laughed the Colonel, "but I've thought of trying the ingenious
plan of the man who pulled up the plants and carefully watered the
weeds, expecting the usual contrary results."
Luncheon was announced and they went out together, shivering at the
change in temperature between the library and the dining-room, where
there would be no cheerful open fire until the dinner hour.
"What are you going to do this afternoon?" queried the Colonel.
"Why, work, I suppose--at least until I get too tired to work any more."
"You seem to believe in an eight-hour day."
Something in the tone gave Allison an inkling of the fact that his
father was lonely and restless in the big house. When they were abroad,
he had managed to occupy himself pleasantly while Allison was busy, and,
for the first time, the young man wondered whether it had been wise to
come back.
The loneliness of the great rooms was evident, if one looked for it, and
the silence was literally to be felt, everywhere. It is difficult for
two people to be happy in a large house; they need the cosiness
established by walls not too far apart, ceilings not too high, and the
necessary furniture not too widely separated. A single row of books,
within easy reach, may hint of companionship not possible to the great
bookcase across a large room.
"I think," said Allison, "that perhaps this house is too large for us.
Why should we need fifteen rooms?"
"We don't, but what's the use of moving again just now, when we're all
settled."
"It's no trouble to move," returned the young man.
"It might be, if we did it ourselves. I fancy that Miss Rose could give
us a few pointers on the subject of opening an old house."
"There may be something in that," admitted Allison. "What charming
neighbours they are!" he added, in a burst of enthusiasm.
"Madame Bernard," replied the Colonel, with emphasis, "is one of the
finest women I have ever had the good fortune to meet. Miss Rose is like
her, but I have known only one other of the same sort."
"And the other was--"
"Your mother."
The Colonel pushed back his plate and went to the window. Beyond the
mountains, somewhere in "God's acre," was the little sunken grave still
enfolding a handful of sacred dust. With a sudden throb of pain, Allison
realised, for the first time in his life, that his father was an old
man. The fine, strong face, outlined clearly by the pitiless afternoon
sun, was deeply lined: the broad shoulders were stooped a little, and
the serene eyes dimmed as though by mist. In the moment he seemed to
have crossed the dividing line between maturity and age.
Allison was about to suggest that they take a walk after luncheon,
having Madame Bernard's household in mind as the ultimate object, but,
before he could speak, the Colonel had turned away from the window.
"Some day you'll marry, lad," he said, in a strange tone.
Allison smiled and shrugged his shoulders doubtfully.
"And then," the Colonel continued, with a little catch in his voice,
"the house will be none too large for two--for you two."
Very rarely, and for a moment only, Allison looked like his mother. For
an instant she lived again in her son's eyes, then vanished.
"Dad," he said, gently, "I'm sure you wouldn't desert me even if I did
marry. You've stood by me too long."
The stooped shoulders straightened and the Colonel smiled. "Do you mean
that--if you married, you'd still--want me?"
"Most assuredly."
"She wouldn't."
"If she didn't," returned Allison, lightly, "she wouldn't get me. Not
that I'm any prize to be wrangled over by the fair sex, individually or
collectively, but you and I stand together, Dad, and don't you forget
it."
The Colonel cleared his throat, tried to speak, then stopped abruptly.
"I have been thinking," he continued, with a swift change of mood and
subject, "that we might manage a dinner party. We're much indebted to
Madame Bernard."
"Good idea! I don't know what sort of party it would prove to be, but,
if we did our best, it would be all right with them. Anyhow, Aunt
Francesca would give an air to it."
"So would the others, Miss Rose especially."
"I wonder why Aunt Francesca didn't marry again," mused Allison.
"Because her heart is deep enough to hold a grave."
"You knew her husband, didn't you?"
"He was my best friend," answered the Colonel, a little sadly. "How the
years separate and destroy, and blot out the things that count for the
most!"
"I wonder how she happened to be named 'Francesca.' It isn't an American
name."
"She wasn't. Her name was 'Mary Frances,' and he changed it to 'Marie
Francesca.' So she has been 'Marie Francesca' ever since, though she
never uses the 'Marie.' That was his name for her."
"The change suits her someway. Queer idea she has about names fitting
people, and yet it isn't so queer, either, when you come to think of it.
Rose might have been named Abigail or Jerusha, yet I believe people
would have found out she was like a rose and called her by her proper
name."
Colonel Kent flashed a quick glance at him, but the expression of his
face had not changed. "And Isabel?" he queried, lightly.
"Isabel's only a kid and it doesn't matter so much whether things fit
her or not. I've promised to take her to the theatre," he continued,
irrelevantly, "because Aunt Francesca wants her guest to be amused. I'm
also commissioned to find some youths about twenty and trot 'em round
for Isabel's inspection. Do you know of anybody?"
"I've seen only one who might do. There's a lanky boy with unruly hair
and an expansive smile whom I've seen at the post-office a time or two.
He usually has a girl with him, but she may be his sister. They look
astonishingly alike."
"Bet it's the Crosby twins. I'd like to see the little devils, if
they've grown up."
"They're grown up, whoever they are. The boy is almost as tall as I am
and his sister doesn't lack much of it."
"I must hunt 'em up. They've already called on Isabel, and perhaps, when
she returns the call, she'll take me along."
"Who brought them up?" asked the Colonel idly.
"They've brought themselves up, for the last five or six years, and I'm
of the opinion that they've always done it."
"Let's invite them to the dinner party."
Allison's eyes danced at the suggestion. "All right, but we'll have to
see 'em first. They may not want to come."
"I've often wondered," mused the Colonel, "why it is so much more
pleasant to entertain than it is to be entertained. I'd rather have a
guest any day than to be one."
"And yet," returned Allison, "if you are a guest, you can get away any
time you want to, within reasonable limits. If you're entertaining,
you've got to keep it going until they all want to go."
"In that case, it might be better for us if we went to Crosbys'."
"We can do that, too. I think it would be fun, though, to have 'em here.
We need another man in one sense, though not in another."
"I have frequently had occasion to observe," remarked the Colonel, "that
many promising dinners are wholly spoiled by the idea that there must be
an equal number of men and women. One uncongenial guest can ruin a
dinner more easily than a poor salad--and that is saying a great deal."
"Your salad days aren't over yet, evidently."
"I hope not."
The hour of talk had done the Colonel a great deal of good, and he was
quite himself again. Some new magazines had come in the afternoon mail
and lay on the library table. He fingered the paper knife absently as he
tore off the outer wrappings and threw them into the fire.
"I believe I'll go up and work for a couple of hours," said Allison,
"and then we'll go out for a walk."
"All right, lad. I'll be ready."
Even after the strains of the violin sounded faintly from upstairs,
accompanied by a rhythmic tread as Allison walked to and fro, Colonel
Kent did not begin to cut the leaves.
Instead, he sat gazing into the fire, thinking. Quite unconsciously, for
years, he had been carrying a heavy burden--the fear that Allison would
marry and that his marriage would bring separation. Now he was greatly
reassured. "And yet," he thought, "there's no telling what a woman may
do."
The sense that his work was done still haunted him, and, resolutely, he
tried to push it aside. "While there's life, there's work," he said to
himself. He knew, however, as he had not known before, that Allison was
past the need of his father, except for companionship.
The old house seemed familiar, yet as though it belonged to another
life. He remembered the building of it, when, with a girl's golden head
upon his shoulder, they had studied plans together far into the night.
As though it were yesterday, their delight at the real beginning came
back. There was another radiant hour, when the rough flooring for the
first story was laid, and, with bare scantlings reared, skeleton-like,
all around them, they actually went into their own house.
One by one, through the vanished years, he sought out the links that
bound him to the past. The day the bride came home from the honeymoon,
and knelt, with him, upon the hearth-stone, to light their first fire
together; the day she came to him, smiling, to whisper to him the secret
that lay beneath her heart; the long waiting, half fearful and half
sweet, then the hours of terror that made an eternity of a night, then
the dawn, that brought the ultimate, unbroken peace which only God can
change.
Over there, in front of the fireplace in the library, the little mother
had lain in her last sleep. The heavy scent of tuberoses, the rumble of
wheels, the slow sound of many feet, and the tiny, wailing cry that
followed them when he and she went out of their house together for the
last time--it all came back, but, mercifully, without pain.
Were it not for this divine forgetting, few of us could bear life. One
can recall only the fact of suffering, never the suffering itself. When
a sorrow is once healed, it leaves only a tender memory, to come back,
perhaps, in many a twilight hour, with tears from which the bitterness
has been distilled.
Slowly, too, by the wonderful magic of the years, unknown joys reveal
themselves and stand before us, as though risen from the dead. At such
and such a time, we were happy, but we did not know it. In the midst of
sorrow, the joy comes back, not reproachfully, but to beckon us on, with
clearer sight, to those which lie on the path beyond.
He remembered, too, that after the first sharp agony of bereavement was
over; when he had learned that even Death does not deny Love, he had
seemed to enter some mysterious fellowship. Gradually, he became aware
of the hidden griefs of others, and from many unsuspected sources came
consolation. Even those whom he had thought hard and cold cherished some
holy of holies--some sacred altar where a bruised heart had been healed
and the bitterness taken away.
He had come to see that the world was full of kindness; that through the
countless masks of varying personalities, all hearts beat in perfect
unison, and that joy, in reality, is immortal, while pain dies in a day.
"And yet," he thought, "how strange it is that life must be nearly over,
before one fully learns to live."
The fire crackled cheerily on the hearth, the sunbeams danced gaily
through the old house, spending gold-dust generously in corners that
were usually dark, and the uncut magazine slipped to the floor. Above,
the violin sang high and clear. The Colonel leaned back in his chair and
closed his eyes.
When Allison came down, he was asleep, with the peace of Heaven upon his
face, and so quiet that the young man leaned over him, a little
frightened, to wait for the next deep breath. Reassured, he did not wake
him, but went for his walk alone.
VIII
"THE YEAR'S AT THE SPRING"
Outside, in the grey darkness, the earth was soft with snow. Upon the
illimitable horizon beyond the mountain peaks were straying gleams of
dawn, colourless, but none the less surely a promise of daybreak.
Rose had been awake for some time, listening to the ice-clad branches
that clattered with every passing breeze. A maple bough, tapping on her
window as ghostly fingers might, had first aroused her from a medley of
dreams.
She went to the window, shivering a little, and, while she stood there,
watching the faint glow in the East, the wind changed in quality, though
it was still cool. Hints of warmth and fragrance were indefinably
blended with the cold, and Rose laughed as she crept back to bed, for
she had chanced upon the mysterious hour when the Weaver of the Seasons
changed the pattern upon the loom.
Having raised another window shade, she could see the dawn from where
she lay. Tints of gold and amethyst came slowly upon the grey and made
the horizon delicately iridescent, like mother-of-pearl. Warm and soft
from the Southland, the first wind of Spring danced merrily into Madame
Francesca's sleeping garden, thrilling all the life beneath the sod.
With the first beam of sun, the ice began to drip from the imprisoned
trees and every fibre of shrub and tree to quiver with aspiration, as
though a clod should suddenly find a soul.
In the watcher's heart, too, had come another Spring, for once in time
and tune with the outer world. The heart's seasons seldom coincide with
the calendar. Who among us has not been made desolate beyond all words
upon some golden day when the little creatures of the air and meadow
were life incarnate, from sheer joy of living? Who among us has not come
home, singing, when the streets were almost impassable with snow, or met
a friend with a happy, smiling face, in the midst of a pouring rain?
The soul, too, has its own hours of Winter and Spring. Gethsemane and
Calvary may come to us in the time of roses and Easter rise upon us in a
December night. How shall we know, in our own agony, of another's
gladness, or, on that blessed to-morrow when the struggle is over, help
someone else to bear our own forgotten pain?
True sympathy is possible only when the season of one soul accords with
that of another, or else when memory, divinely tender, brings back a
vivid, scarlet hour out of grey, forgotten days, to enable us to share,
with another, his own full measure of sorrow or of joy.
Ah, but the world was awake at last! Javelin-like, across a field of
melting snow, went a flash of blue wings, and in Madame Francesca's own
garden a robin piped his cheery strain upon the topmost bough of a
dripping tree.
The woman, too, was awake, in every fibre of body and soul. Even her
finger-tips seemed sentient and alive; her heart was strangely lifted,
as though by imprisoned wings. She had no doubt of the ultimate hour,
when he would know also, yet, half-afraid, she shrank from it, as she
would not have shrunk from pain.
Madame had once remarked that civilisation must have begun not earlier
than nine in the morning, or later than noon. She had a horror of the
early breakfast, when the family, cold, but clean, gathers itself around
the board which only last night was festive and strives valiantly to be
pleasant. It was almost an axiom with her that human, friendly
conversation was not possible before nine in the morning.
So, as there was no one else to be pleased, the three women breakfasted
when and where they chose. If Rose preferred to robe herself
immaculately in white linen and have her coffee in the dining-room at
seven, she was at liberty to do so. If she wanted it in her own room, at
ten, that also was easily managed, but this was the only "movable feast"
Madame would permit. Luncheon and dinner went precisely by tae clock,
year in and year out.
Too happy to sleep and yearning to be outdoors, Rose dressed quietly and
tiptoed down-stairs. She smiled whimsically as the heavy front door
slammed behind her, wondering if it would wake the others and if they,
too, would know that it was Spring.
Tips of green showed now and then where the bulbs were planted, and,
down in the wild garden, when she brushed aside the snow, Rose found a
blushing hepatica in full bloom. "How indiscreet," she thought, then
added, to herself, "but what sublime courage it must take to blossom
now!"
The plump robin, whose winter had evidently been pleasant, hopped about
the garden after her, occasionally seeking shelter on the lower bough of
a tree if she turned, or came too near. "Don't be afraid," she called,
aloud, then laughed, as with a farewell chirp and a flutter of wings,
the robin took himself beyond the reach of further conversational
liberties.
Her pulses leaped with abundant life; the wet road lured her eager feet.
She went out, leaving the gate open, and turned toward the woods, where
a flock of wild geese, breasting the chill winds far above the river,
was steadily cleaving a passage to the friendly North.
When she reached the woods, where the white birches stood like shy
dryads among the oaks, she heard once more the robin's flutelike call.
It was answered by another, exactly upon the same notes, yet wholly
different as to quality. Presently, among the trees, she caught a
glimpse of a tall man, and she paused for an instant, frightened. Then
her heart leaped and her cheeks burned, as she saw who it was.
"Boy!" she called, clearly. "Oh, Boy!"
Allison turned, startled, then came to her, smiling, hat in hand. "Upon
my word," he said. "I didn't think there was anyone else mad enough to
come out at this hour."
"Why it's Spring! Didn't you know?"
"Yes. It came this morning just before sunrise."
"Were you awake?"
"Yes, were you?"
"Of course," she answered. "I couldn't stay in."
"Nor could I."
"The year's at the spring,
And day's at the morn;
Morning's at seven;
The hill-side's dew-pearled,"
Rose quoted. "You know the rest, don't you?"
"The rest doesn't matter. 'Morning waits at the end of the world--Gypsy,
come away!'"
"I'll go," she breathed, her eyes fixed on his, "anywhere!"
"To the river, then. The last time I saw it, ice and snow had hidden it
completely."
The path was narrow until they got out of the woods, so Rose went ahead.
"I don't believe I fooled that robin by whistling to him," Allison
continued. "He pretended I did, but I believe he was only trying to be
polite."
"He wasn't, if it was the same robin I saw in our garden this morning. I
spoke to him most pleasantly and told him not to be afraid of me, but he
disappeared with a very brief, chirpy good-bye."
"Don't hurry so," he said, as he came up beside her and assisted her
over a fallen tree. "We've got the whole day, haven't we?"
"We have all the time there is," laughed Rose. "Everybody has, for that
matter."
"Have you had your breakfast?"
"No, have you?"
"Far from it. Everybody was asleep when I came out."
"Then you'll have breakfast with me," she said, quickly.
"Thank you," he smiled, "for taking the hint."
"But won't your father miss you?" she queried, with mock seriousness.
"He pays no attention whatever to my irregular habits, and I think
that's one reason why we get on so well together. It's a wise father who
knows his own child."
"Especially if it is a wise child," she replied. Her eyes were dancing
with mirth, a scarlet signal burned on either cheek, and her parted lips
were crimson. She seemed lovelier to him than ever before.
"Honestly, Rose, you seem to get prettier every day."
"Then," she smiled, "if I were younger, I might eventually become
dangerous."
"Rose--"
"Old Rose," she interrupted. The high colour faded from her face as she
spoke and left her pale.
Allison put his hand on her arm and stopped. "Rose, please don't. You're
not a day older than I am."
"Ten years," she insisted stubbornly, for women are wont to lean upon
the knife that stabs them and she was in a reckless mood. "When you're
forty, I'll be fifty."
A shadow crossed his face. "It hurts me, someway, to have you talk so. I
don't know how--nor why."
In a single swift surge her colour came back. "All right," she answered,
quietly, "hereafter I'm thirty, also. Thanking you for giving me ten
more years of life, for I love it so!"
The sun was well up in the heavens when they came to the river, and the
dark, rippling surface gave back the light in a thousand little dancing
gleams. The ice was broken, the snow was gone, and fragments of
shattered crystal went gently toward the open sea, lured by the song of
the river underneath.
"It doesn't look deep," remarked Rose.
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