Books: The Journal of a Tour to the Hebrides with Samuel Johnson, LL.D.

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Col also told us, that the same person having come up with a serjeant
and twenty men, working on the high road, he entered into discourse
with the serjeant, and then gave him sixpence for the men to drink.
The serjeant asked, 'Who is this fellow?' Upon being informed, he
said, 'If I had known who he was, I should have thrown it in his
face.' JOHNSON. 'There is much want of sense in all this. He had no
business to speak with the serjeant. He might have been in haste, and
trotted on. He had not learnt to be a miser: I believe we must take
him apprentice.' BOSWELL. 'He would grudge giving half a guinea to be
taught' JOHNSON. 'Nay, sir, you must teach him gratis. You must give
him an opportunity to practice your precepts.'

Let me now go back, and glean Johnsoniana. The Saturday before we
sailed from Slate, I sat awhile in the afternoon with Dr Johnson in
his room, in a quiet serious frame. I observed, that hardly any man
was accurately prepared for dying; but almost every one left something
undone, something in confusion; that my father, indeed, told me he
knew one man (Carlisle of Limekilns), after whose death all his papers
were found in exact order; and nothing was omitted in his will.
JOHNSON. 'Sir, I had an uncle who died so; but such attention requires
great leisure, and great firmness of mind. If one was to think
constantly of death, the business of life would stand still. I am no
friend to making religion appear too hard. Many good people have done
harm, by giving severe notions of it. In the same way, as to learning:
I never frighten young people with difficulties; on the contrary, I
tell them that they may very easily get as much as will do very well.
I do not indeed tell them that they will be BENTLEYS.'

The night we rode to Col's house, I said, 'Lord Elibank is probably
wondering what is become of us.' JOHNSON. 'No, no; he is not thinking
of us.' BOSWELL. 'But recollect the warmth with which he wrote. Are we
not to believe a man, when he says he has a great desire to see
another? Don't you believe that I was very impatient for your coming
to Scotland?' JOHNSON. 'Yes, sir; I believe you were; and I was
impatient to come to you. A young man feels so, but seldom an old
man.' I however convinced him that Lord Elibank, who has much of the
spirit of a young man, might feel so. He asked me if our jaunt had
answered expectation. I said it had much exceeded it. I expected much
difficulty with him, and had not found it 'And,' he added, 'wherever
we have come, we have been received like princes in their progress.'

He said, he would not wish not to be disgusted in the Highlands; for
that would be to lose the power of distinguishing, and a man might
then lie down in the middle of them. He wished only to conceal his
disgust.

At Captain M'Lean's, I mentioned Pope's friend, Spence. JOHNSON. 'He
was a weak conceited man.' [Footnote: Mr Langton thinks this must have
been the hasty expression of a splenetick moment as he has heard Dr
Johnson speak of Mr Spence's judgement in criticism with so high a
degree of respect, as to shew that this was not his settled opinion of
him. Let me add that in the preface to the Preceptor, he recommends
Spence's Essay on Pope's Odyssey, and that his admirable lives of the
English Poets are much enriched by Spence's Anecdotes of Pope.
BOSWELL. 'A good scholar, sir?' JOHNSON. 'Why, no, sir.' BOSWELL. 'He
was a pretty scholar.' JOHNSON. 'You have about reached him.']

Last night at the inn, when the factor in Tyr-yi spoke of his having
heard that a roof was put on some part of the buildings at Icolmkill,
I unluckily said, 'It will be fortunate if we find a cathedral with a
roof on it.' I said this from a foolish anxiety to engage Dr Johnson's
curiosity more. He took me short at once. 'What, sir? How can you talk
so? If we shall FIND a cathedral roofed! As if we were going to a
terra incognita; when every thing that is at Icolmkill is so well
known. You are like some New England men who came to the mouth of the
Thames. "Come," said they, "let us go up and see what sort of
inhabitants there are here." They talked, sir, as if they had been to
go up the Susquehannah, or any other American river.'

Saturday, 16th October

This day there was a new moon, and the weather changed for the better.
Dr Johnson said of Miss M'Lean, 'She is the most accomplished lady
that I have found in the Highlands. She knows French, musick, and
drawing, sews neatly, makes shell-work, and can milk cows; in short,
she can do every thing. She talks sensibly, and is the first person
whom I have found, that can translate Erse poetry literally.' We set
out, mounted on little Mull horses. Mull corresponded exactly with the
idea which I had always had of it; a hilly country, diversified with
heath and grass, and many rivulets. Dr Johnson was not in very good
humour. He said, it was a dreary country, much worse than Sky. I
differed from him, 'O, sir,' said he, 'a most dolorous country!'

We had a very hard journey to-day. I had no bridle for my sheltie, but
only a halter; and Joseph rode without a saddle. At one place, a loch
having swelled over the road, we were obliged to plunge through pretty
deep water. Dr Johnson observed, how helpless a man would be, were he
travelling here alone, and should meet with any accident; and said,
'he longed to get to a country of saddles and bridles'. He was more
out of humour to-day, than he has been in the course of our tour,
being fretted to find that his little horse could scarcely support his
weight; and having suffered a loss, which, though small in itself, was
of some consequence to him, while travelling the rugged steeps of
Mull, where he was at times obliged to walk. The loss that I allude to
was that of the large oak-stick, which, as I formerly mentioned, he
had brought with him from London. It was of great use to him in our
wild peregrination; for, ever since his last illness in 1766, he has
had a weakness in his knees, and has not been able to walk easily. It
had too the properties of a measure; for one nail was driven into it
at the length of a foot; another at that of a yard. In return for the
services it had done him, he said, this morning he would make a
present of it to some museum; but he little thought he was so soon to
lose it. As he preferred riding with a switch, it was intrusted to a
fellow to be delivered to our baggage-man, who followed us at some
distance; but we never saw it more. I could not persuade him out of a
suspicion that it had been stolen. 'No, no, my friend,' said he, 'it
is not to be expected that any man in Mull, who has got it, will part
with it. Consider, sir, the value of such a PIECE OF TIMBER here!'

As we travelled this forenoon, we met Dr M'Lean, who expressed much
regret at his having been so unfortunate as to be absent while we were
at his house.

We were in hopes to get to Sir Allan Maclean's at Inchkenneth,
to-night; but the eight miles, of which our road was said to consist,
were so very long, that we did not reach the opposite coast of Mull
till seven at night, though we had set out about eleven in the
forenoon; and when we did arrive there, we found the wind strong
against us. Col determined that we should pass the night at
M'Quarrie's, in the island of Ulva, which lies between Mull and
Inchkenneth; and a servant was sent forward to the ferry, to secure
the boat for us: but the boat was gone to the Ulva side, and the wind
was so high that the people could not hear him call; and the night so
dark that they could not see a signal. We should have been in a very
bad situation, had there not fortunately been lying in the little
sound of Ulva an Irish vessel, the Bonnetta, of Londonderry, Captain
M'Lure, master. He himself was at M'Quarrie's; but his men obligingly
came with their long-boat, and ferried us over.

M'Quarrie's house was mean; but we were agreeably surprised with the
appearance of the master, whom we found to be intelligent, polite, and
much a man of the world. Though his clan is not numerous, he is a very
ancient chief, and has a burial place at Icolmkill. He told us, his
family had possessed Ulva for nine hundred years; but I was distressed
to hear that it was soon to be sold for the payment of his debts.

Captain M'Lure, whom we found here, was of Scotch extraction, and
properly a M'Leod, being descended of some of the M'Leods who went
with Sir Normand of Bernera to the battle of Worcester, and after the
defeat of the royalists, fled to Ireland, and, to conceal themselves,
took a different name. He told me, there was a great number of them
about Londonderry; some of good property. I said, they should now
resume their real name. The Laird of M'Leod should go over, and
assemble them, and make them all drink the large horn full, and from
that time they should be M'Leods. The captain informed us, he had
named his ship the Bonnetta, out of gratitude to Providence; for once,
when he was sailing to America with a good number of passengers, the
ship in which he then sailed was becalmed for five weeks, and during
all that time, numbers of the fish bonnetta swam close to her, and
were caught for food; he resolved therefore, that the ship he should
next get, should be called the Bonnetta.

M'Quarrie told us a strong instance of the second sight. He had gone
to Edinburgh, and taken a man-servant along with him. An old woman,
who was in the house, said one day, 'M'Quarrie will be at home to-
morrow, and will bring two gentlemen with him'; and she said, she saw
his servant return in red and green. He did come home next day. He had
two gentlemen with him; and his servant had a new red and green
livery, which M'Quarrie had bought for him at Edinburgh, upon a sudden
thought, not having the least intention when he left home to put his
servant in livery, so that the old woman could not have heard any
previous mention of it. This, he assured us, was a true story.

M'Quarrie insisted that the mercheta mulierum, mentioned in our old
charters, did really mean the privilege which a lord of a manor, or a
baron, had, to have the first night of all his vassals' wives. Dr
Johnson said, the belief of such a custom having existed was also held
in England, where there is a tenure called Borough-English, by which
the eldest child does not inherit, from a doubt of his being the son
of the tenant. [Footnote: Sir William Blackstone says in his
Commentaries, that 'he cannot find that ever this custom prevailed in
England'; and therefore he is of opinion that it could not have given
rise to Borough-English.] M'Quarrie told us, that still, on the
marriage of each of his tenants, a sheep is due to him; for which the
composition is fixed at five shillings. I suppose, Ulva is the only
place where this custom remains.

Talking of the sale of an estate of an ancient family, which was said
to have been purchased much under its value by the confidential lawyer
of that family, and it being mentioned that the sale would probably be
set aside by a suit in equity, Dr Johnson said, 'I am very willing
that this sale should be set aside, but I doubt much whether the suit
will be successful; for the argument for avoiding the sale is founded
on vague and indeterminate principles, as that the price was too low,
and that there was a great degree of confidence placed by the seller
in the person who became the purchaser. Now, how low should a price
be? or what degree of confidence should there be to make a bargain be
set aside? a bargain, which is a wager of skill between man and man.
If, indeed, any fraud can be proved, that will do.'

When Dr Johnson and I were by ourselves at night, I observed of our
host, 'aspectum generosum habet.' 'Et generosum animum,' he added. For
fear of being overheard in the small Highland houses, I often talked
to him in such Latin as I could speak, and with as much of the English
accent as I could assume, so as not to be understood, in case our
conversation should be too loud for the space.

We had each an elegant bed in the same room; and here it was that a
circumstance occurred, as to which he has been strangely
misunderstood. From his description of his chamber, it has erroneously
been supposed, that his bed being too short for him, his feet, during
the night, were in the mire; whereas he has only said, that when he
undressed, he felt his feet in the mire: that is, the clay-floor of
the room, on which he stood before he went into bed, was wet, in
consequence of the windows being broken, which let in the rain.

Sunday, 17th October

Being informed that there was nothing worthy of observation in Ulva,
we took boat, and proceeded to Inchkenneth, where we were introduced
by our friend Col to Sir Allan M'Lean, the chief of his clan, and to
two young ladies, his daughters. Inchkenneth is a pretty little
island, a mile long, and about half a mile broad, all good land.

As we walked up from the shore, Dr Johnson's heart was cheered by the
sight of a road marked with cart-wheels, as on the main land; a thing
which we had not seen for a long time. It gave us a pleasure similar
to that which a traveller feels, when, whilst wandering on what he
fears is a desert island, he perceives the print of human feet.

Military men acquire excellent habits of having all conveniencies
about them. Sir Allan M'Lean, who had been long in the army, and had
now a lease of the island, had formed a commodious habitation, though
it consisted but of a few small buildings, only one story high. He
had, in his little apartments, more things than I could enumerate in a
page or two.

Among other agreeable circumstances, it was not the least, to find
here a parcel of the Caledonian Mercury, published since we left
Edinburgh; which I read with that pleasure which every man feels who
has been for some time secluded from the animated scenes of the busy
world.

Dr Johnson found books here. He bade me buy Bishop Gastrell's
Christian Institutes, which was lying in the room. He said, 'I do not
like to read any thing on a Sunday, but what is theological; not that
I would scrupulously refuse to look at any thing which a friend should
shew me in a newspaper; but in general, I would read only what is
theological. I read just now some of Drummond's Travels, before I
perceived what books were here. I then took up Derham's
Physico-Theology.

Every particular concerning this island having been so well described
by Dr Johnson, it would be superfluous in me to present the publick
with the observations that I made upon it, in my Journal.

I was quite easy with Sir Allan almost instantaneously. He knew the
great intimacy that had been between my father and his predecessor,
Sir Hector, and was himself of a very frank disposition. After dinner,
Sir Allan said he had got Dr Campbell about a hundred subscribers to
his Britannia Elucidata (a work since published under the title of A
Political Survey of Great Britain), of whom he believed twenty were
dead, the publication having been so long delayed. JOHNSON. 'Sir, I
imagine the delay of publication is owing to this; that, after
publication, there will be no more subscribers, and few will send the
additional guinea to get their books: in which they will be wrong; for
there will be a great deal of instruction in the work. I think highly
of Campbell. In the first place, he has very good parts. In the second
place, he has very extensive reading; not, perhaps, what is properly
called learning, but history, politicks, and, in short, that popular
knowledge which makes a man very useful. In the third place, he has
learned much by what is called the vox viva. He talks with a great
many people.'

Speaking of this gentleman, at Rasay, he told us, that he one day
called on him, and they talked of Tull's Husbandry. Dr Campbell said
something. Dr Johnson began to dispute it. 'Come,' said Dr Campbell,
'we do not want to get the better of one another: we want to encrease
each other's ideas.' Dr Johnson took it in good part, and the
conversation then went on coolly and instructively. His candour in
relating this anecdote does him much credit, and his conduct on that
occasion proves how easily he could be persuaded to talk from a better
motive than 'for victory'.

Dr Johnson here shewed so much of the spirit of a highlander, that he
won Sir Allan's heart: indeed, he has shewn it during the whole of our
tour. One night, in Col, he strutted about the room with a broad-sword
and target, and made a formidable appearance; and, another night, I
took the liberty to put a large blue bonnet on his head. His age, his
size, and his bushy grey wig, with this covering on it, presented the
image of a venerable senachi: and, however unfavourable to the Lowland
Scots, he seemed much pleased to assume the appearance of an ancient
Caledonian. We only regretted that he could not be prevailed with to
partake of the social glass. One of his arguments against drinking,
appears to me not convincing. He urged, that, 'in proportion as
drinking makes a man different from what he is before he has drunk, it
is bad; because it has so far affected his reason'. But may it not be
answered, that a man may be altered by it FOR THE BETTER; that his
spirits may be exhilarated, without his reason being affected? On the
general subject of drinking, however, I do not mean positively to take
the other side. I am dubius, non improbus.

In the evening, Sir Allan informed us that it was the custom of his
house to have prayers every Sunday; and Miss M'Lean read the evening
service, in which we all joined. I then read Ogden's second and ninth
sermons on prayer, which, with their other distinguished excellence,
have the merit of being short. Dr Johnson said, that it was the most
agreeable Sunday he had ever passed; and it made such an impression on
his mind, that he afterwards wrote the following Latin verses upon
Inchkenneth:

INSULA SANCTI KENNETHI

Parva quidem regio, sed relligione priorum

Nota, Caledonias panditur inter aquas;
Voce ubi Cennethus populos domuisse feroces
Dicitur, et vanos dedocuisse deos.
Huc ego delatus placido per coerula cursu
Scire locum volui quid daret itte novi.
Illic Leniades humili regnabat in aula,
Leniades magnis nobilitatus avis:
Una duas habuit casa cum genitore puellas,
Quas Amor undarum fingeret esse deas:
Non tamen inculti gelidis latuere sub antris,
Accola Danubii qualia saevus habet;
Mollia non deerant vacuae solatia vitae,
Sive libros poscant otia, sive lyram.
Luxerat illa dies, legis gens docta supernae
Spes hominum ac curas cum procul esse jubet,
Ponti inter strepitus sacri non munera cultus
Cessarunt; pietas hic quoque cura fuit:
Quid quod sacrifici versavit femina libros,
Legitimas faciunt pectora pura preces.
Quo vagor ulterius? quod ubique requiritur hic est;
Hic secura quies, hic et honestus amor.

Monday, 18th October

We agreed to pass this day with Sir Allan, and he engaged to have
every thing in order for our voyage to-morrow.

Being now soon to be separated from our amiable friend young Col, his
merits were all remembered. At Ulva he had appeared in a new
character, having given us a good prescription for a cold. On my
mentioning him with warmth, Dr Johnson said, 'Col does every thing for
us: we will erect a statue to Col.' 'Yes,' said I, 'and we will have
him with his various attributes and characters, like Mercury, or any
other of the heathen gods. We will have him as a pilot; we will have
him as a fisherman, as a hunter, as a husbandman, as a physician.'

I this morning took a spade, and dug a little grave in the floor of a
ruined chapel, near Sir Allan M'Lean's house, in which I buried some
human bones I found there. Dr Johnson praised me for what I had done,
though he owned, he could not have done it. He shewed in the chapel at
Rasay his horrour at dead men's bones. He shewed it again at Col's
house. In the charter-room there was a remarkable large shin-bone;
which was said to have been a bone of John Garve, one of the lairds.
Dr Johnson would not look at it; but started away.

At breakfast, I asked, 'What is the reason that we are angry at a
trader's having opulence?' JOHNSON. 'Why, sir, the reason is (though I
don't undertake to prove that there is a reason), we see no qualities
in trade that should entitle a man to superiority. We are not angry at
a soldier's getting riches, because we see that he possesses qualities
which we have not. If a man returns from a battle, having lost one
hand, and with the other full of gold, we feel that he deserves the
gold; but we cannot think that a fellow, by sitting all day at a desk,
is entitled to get above us.' BOSWELL. 'But, sir, may we not suppose a
merchant to be a man of an enlarged mind, such as Addison in the
Spectator describes Sir Andrew Freeport to have been?' JOHNSON. 'Why,
sir, we may suppose any fictitious character. We may suppose a
philosophical day-labourer, who is happy in reflecting that, by his
labour, he contributes to the fertility of the earth, and to the
support of his fellow-creatures; but we find no such philosophical
day-labourer. A merchant may, perhaps, be a man of an enlarged mind;
but there is nothing in trade connected with an enlarged mind.'

I mentioned that I heard Dr Solander say he was a Swedish Laplander.
JOHNSON. 'Sir, I don't believe he is a Laplander. The Laplanders are
not much above four feet high. He is as tall as you; and he has not
the copper colour of a Laplander.' BOSWELL. 'But what motive could he
have to make himself a Laplander?' JOHNSON. 'Why, sir, he must either
mean the word Laplander in a very extensive sense, or may mean a
voluntary degradation of himself. "For all my being the great man that
you see me now, I was originally a barbarian"; as if Burke should say,
"I came over a wild Irishman," which he might say in his present state
of exaltation.'

Having expressed a desire to have an island like Inchkenneth, Dr
Johnson set himself to think what would be necessary for a man in such
a situation. 'Sir, I should build me a fortification, if I came to
live here; for, if you have it not, what should hinder a parcel of
ruffians to land in the night, and carry off every thing you have in
the house, which, in a remote country, would be more valuable than
cows and sheep? Add to all this the danger of having your throat cut.'
BOSWELL. 'I would have a large dog.' JOHNSON. 'So you may, sir; but a
large dog is of no use but to alarm. He, however, I apprehend, thinks
too lightly of the power of that animal. I have heard him say, that he
is afraid of no dog. 'He would take him up by the hinder legs, which
would render him quite helpless, and then knock his head against a
stone, and beat out his brains.' Topham Beauclerk told me, that at his
house in the country, two large ferocious dogs were fighting. Dr
Johnson looked steadily at them for a little while; and then, as one
would separate two little boys, who are foolishly hurting each other,
he ran up to them, and cuffed their heads till he drove them asunder.
But few men have his intrepidity, Herculean strength, or presence of
mind. Most thieves or robbers would be afraid to encounter a mastiff.

I observed, that, when young Col talked of the lands belonging to his
family, he always said, 'MY lands'. For this he had a plausible
pretence; for he told me, there has been a custom in this family, that
the laird resigns the estate to the eldest son when he comes of age,
reserving to himself only a certain life-rent. He said, it was a
voluntary custom; but I think I found an instance in the charter-room,
that there was such an obligation in a contract of marriage. If the
custom was voluntary, it was only curious; but if founded on
obligation, it might be dangerous; for I have been told, that in
Otaheite, whenever a child is born (a son, I think), the father loses
his right to the estate and honours, and that this unnatural, or
rather absurd custom, occasions the murder of many children.

Young Col told us he could run down a greyhound; 'for,' said he, 'the
dog runs himself out of breath, by going too quick, and then I get up
with him.' I accounted for his advantage over the dog, by remarking
that Col had the faculty of reason, and knew how to moderate his pace,
which the dog had not sense enough to do. Dr Johnson said, 'He is a
noble animal. He is as complete an islander as the mind can figure. He
is a farmer, a sailor, a hunter, a fisher: he will run you down a dog:
if any man has a tail it is Col. He is hospitable; and he has an
intrepidity of talk, whether he understands the subject or not. I
regret that he is not more intellectual.'

Dr Johnson observed, that there was nothing of which he would not
undertake to persuade a Frenchman in a foreign country. I'll carry a
Frenchman to St Paul's Church-yard, and I'll tell him, "by our law you
may walk half round the church; but, if you walk round the whole, you
will be punished capitally", and he will believe me at once. Now, no
Englishman would readily swallow such a thing: he would go and inquire
of somebody else.' The Frenchman's credulity, I observed, must be
owing to his being accustomed to implicit submission; whereas every
Englishman reasons upon the laws of his country, and instructs his
representatives, who compose the legislature.

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