Books: The Letters of Horace Walpole Volume 3

H >> Horace Walpole >> The Letters of Horace Walpole Volume 3

Pages:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 | 46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60 | 61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67

Make many compliments to all your family for me; Lord Beauchamp
was much obliged by your invitation. I shall certainly accept
it, as I return from the north; in the mean time, find out how
Drayton and Althorp lie according to your scale. Adieu! Yours
most sincerely.

Letter 35 To George Montagu, Esq.
Strawberry Hill, July 20, 1760. (page 76)

I shall be very sorry if I don't see you at Oxford on Tuesday
next: but what can I say if your Wetenhalls will break into my
almanack, and take my very day, can I help it! I must own I
shall be glad if their coach-horse is laid up with the
fashionable sore throat and fever can you recommend no coachman
to them like Dr. Wilmot, who will despatch it in three days? If
I don't see you at Oxford, I don't think I shall at Greatworth
till my return from the north, which will be about the 20th or
22d of August. Drayton,(83) be it known to you, is Lady Betty
Germain's., is in your own county, was the old mansion of the
Mordaunts, and is crammed with whatever Sir John could get from
them and the Norfolks. Adieu!

(83) The seat of Sir John Germain, Bart.; by whose will, and that
of his widow, Lady Betty, his property devolved upon Lord George
Sackvillc; who, in consequence, assumed, in 1770, the name of
Germain.-E.

Letter 36 To Sir Horace Mann.
Arlington Street, Aug. 1, 1760. (page 77)

I came to town to-day on purpose to see Stosch, who has been
arrived some days; and to offer him all manner, of civilities on
your account--when indeed they can be of no use to him, for there
is not a soul in town. There was a wild report last week of the
plague being in St. Thomas's Hospital, and to be sure Stosch must
believe there is some truth in it, for there is not a coach to be
seen, the streets are new paving, and the houses new painting,
just as it is always at this season. I told him if he had a mind
to see London, he must go to Huntingdon races, Derby races,
Stafford races, Warwick races-that is the fashionable route this
year-alas! I am going part of it; the Duchess of Grafton and Loo
are going to the Duke of Devonshire's, Lord Gower's, and Lord
Hertford's; but I shall contrive to arrive after every race is
over. Stosch delivered me the parcel safe, and I should have
paid him for your Burgundy, but found company with him, and
thought it not quite so civil to offer it at the first interview,
lest it should make him be taken for a wine-merchant. He dines
with me on Tuesday at Strawberry Hill, when I shall find an
opportunity. He is going for a few days to Wanstead, and then
for three months to a clergyman's in Yorkshire, to learn English.
Apropos, you did not tell me why he comes; is it to sell his
uncle's collection? Let me know before winter on what foot I
must introduce him, for I would fain return a few of the thousand
civilities you have showed at my recommendation.

The hereditary Prince has been beaten, and has beaten, with the
balance on his side; but though the armies are within a mile of
one another, I don't think it clear there will be a battle, as we
may lose much more than we can get. A defeat will cost Hanover
and Hesse; a victory cannot be vast enough to leave us at liberty
to assist the King of Prussia. He gave us a little advantage the
other day; outwitted Daun, and took his camp and magazines, and
aimed at Dresden; but to-day the siege is raised. Daun sometimes
misses himself, but never loses himself. It is not the fashion
to admire him, but for my part, I should think it worth while to
give the Empress a dozen Wolfes and Dauns, to lay aside the
cautious Marshal. Apropos to Wolfe, I cannot Imagine what you
mean by a design executing at Rome for his tomb. The designs
have been laid before my lord chamberlain several months; Wilton,
Adam, Chambers, and others, all gave in their drawings
immediately; and I think the Duke of Devonshire decided for the
first. Do explain this to me, or get a positive explanation. of
it-and whether any body is drawing for Adam or Chambers.

Mr. Chute and Mr. Bentley, to whom I showed your accounts of the
Papa-Portuguese war, were infinitely diverted, as I was too, with
it. The Portuguese, "who will turn Jews not Protestants," and the
Pope's confession, "which does more honour to his sincerity than
to his infallibility," are delightful. I will tell you who will
neither, turn Jew nor Protestant, Day, nor Methodist, which is
much more in fashion than either--Monsieur Fuentes will not; he
has given the Virgin Mary (who he fancies hates public places,
because he never met her at one,) his honour that he never will
go to any more. What a charming sort of Spanish Ambassador! I
wish they always sent us such-the worst they can do, is to buy
half a dozen converts.

My Lady Lincoln,(84) who was ready to be brought to bed, is dead
in three hours of convulsions. It has been a fatal year to great
ladies: within this twelvemonth have gone off Lady Essex, Lady
Besborough, Lady Granby, Lady Anson, and Lady Lincoln. My Lady
Coventry is still alive, sometimes at the point of death,
sometimes recovering. They fixed the spring: now the autumn is
to be critical for her.

I set out for my Lord Strafford's to-morrow se'nnight, so shall
not be able to send you any victory this fortnight.

General Clive(85) is arrived all over estates and diamonds. If a
beggar asks charity, be says, "Friend, I have no small brilliants
about me."

I forgot to tell you that Stosch was to dine with General
Guise.(86) The latter has notified to Christ Church, Oxford,
that in his will he has given them his collection of pictures.
Adieu!

(84) Catherine, eldest daughter of Henry Pelham, wife of Henry
Clinton, Earl of Lincoln, afterwards Duke of newcastle.

(85) Afterwards created Lord Clive in Ireland. It is to him that
we in great measure owe our dominion in India; in the acquisition
of which he is, however, reproached with having exercised great
cruelties.-D.

(86) General Guise did leave his collection as he promised; but
the University employing the son of Bonus, the cleaner of
pictures, to repair them, he entirely repainted them, and as
entirely spoiled them.

Letter 37 To The Earl Of Strafford.
Strawberry Hill, Aug. 7, 1760. (page 78)

My dear lord,
You will laugh, but I am ready to cry, when I tell you that I
have no notion when I shall be able to wait on you.-Such a
calamity!--My tower is not fallen down, nor Lady Fanny Shirley
run away with another printer; nor has my Lady D * * * * insisted
on living with me as half way to Weybridge. Something more
disgraceful than all these, and wofully mortifying for a young
creature, who is at the same time in love with Lady Mary Coke,
and following the Duchess of Grafton and Loo all over the
kingdom. In short, my lord, I have got the gout-yes, the gout in
earnest. I was seized on Monday morning, suffered dismally all
night, am now wrapped in flannels like the picture of a Morocco
ambassador, and am carried to bed by two servants. You see
virtue and leanness are no preservatives. I write this now to
your lordship, because I think it totally impossible that I
should be able to set out the day after to-morrow, as I intended.
The moment I can, I will, but this is a tyrant that will not let
one name a day. All I know is, that it may abridge my other
parties, but shall not my stay at Wentworth Castle. The Duke of
Devonshire was so good as to ask me to be at Chatsworth
yesterday, but I did not know it time enough. As it happens, I
must have disappointed him. At present I look like Pam's father
more than one of his subjects; only one of my legs appears: The
rest my parti.colour'd robe conceals. Adieu! my dear lord.

Letter 38To The Hon. H. S/ Conway.
Strawberry Hill, August 7, 1760. (page 79)

I can give you but an unpleasant account of myself, I mean
unpleasant for me; every body else I suppose it will make laugh.
Come, laugh at once! I am laid up with the gout, am an absolute
cripple, am carried up to bed by two men, and could walk to China
as soon as cross the room. In short, here is my history: I have
been out of order this fortnight, without knowing what was the
matter with me; pains in my head, sicknesses at my stomach,
dispiritedness, and a return of the nightly fever I had in the
winter. I concluded a northern journey would take all this off-
-but, behold! on Monday morning I was seized as I thought with
the cramp in my left foot; however, I walked about all day:
towards evening it discovered itself by its true name, and that
night I suffered a great deal. However, on Tuesday I was -,again
able to go about the house; but since Tuesday I have not been
able to stir, and am wrapped in flannels and swathed like Sir
Paul Pliant on his wedding-night. I expect to hear that there is
a bet at Arthur's, which runs fastest, Jack Harris(87) or I.
Nobody would believe me six years ago when I said I had the gout.
They would do leanness and temperance honours to which they had
not the least claim.

I don't yet give up my expedition; as my foot is much swelled, I
trust this alderman distemper is going: I shall set out the
instant I am able; but I much question whether it will be soon
enough for me to get to Ragley by the time the clock strikes Loo.
I find I grow too old to make the circuit with the charming
Duchess.(88)

I did not tell you about German skirmishes, for I knew nothing of
them: when two vast armies only scratch one another's faces it
gives me no attention. My gazette never contains above one or
two casualties of foreign politics:-overlaid, one king; dead of
convulsions, an electorate; burnt to death, Dresden.

I wish you joy of all your purchases; why, you sound as rich as
if you had had the gout these ten years. I beg their pardon; but
just at present, I am very glad not to be near the vivacity of
either Missy or Peter. I agree with you much about the
Minor:(89) there are certainly parts and wit in it. Adieu!

(87) John Harris, of Hayne in Devonshire, married to Mr. Conway's
eldest sister.

(88) Anne Liddell, Duchess of Grafton.

(89) Foote's comedy of The Minor came out at the Haymarket
theatre, and, though performed by a young and unpractised
company, brought full houses for many nights. In the character
of Mrs. Cole and Mr. Smirk, the author represented those of the
notorious Mother Douglas, and Mr. Langford, the auctioneer. In
the epilogue, spoken by Shift, which the author himself
performed, together with the other two characters, he took off,
to a degree of exactness, the manner and person of the celebrated
George Whitfield.-E.

Letter 39 To George Montagu, Esq.
Strawberry Hill, August 12, 1760. (page 80)

In what part of the island you are just now, I don't know; flying
about some where or other, I suppose. Well, it is charming to be
so young! Here I am, lying upon a couch, wrapped up in flannels,
with the gout in both feet--oh yes, gout in all the terms. Six
years ago I had it, and nobody would believe me--now they may
have proof. My legs are as big as your cousin Guildford's and
they don't use to be quite so large. I was seized yesterday
se'nnight; have had little pain in the day, but most
uncomfortable nights; however, I move about again a little with a
stick. If either my father or mother had had it, I should not
dislike it so much. I am bound enough to approve it if descended
genealogically: but it is an absolute upstart in me, and what is
more provoking, I had trusted to my great abstinence for keeping
me from it: but thus it is, if 1 had had any gentlemanlike
virtue, as patriotism or loyalty, I might have got something by
them: I had nothing but that beggarly virtue temperance, and she
had not interest enough to keep me from a fit of the gout.
Another plague is, that every body that ever knew any body that
had it, is so good as to come with advice, and direct me how to
manage it; that is, how to contrive to have it for a great many
years. I am very refractory; I say to the gout, as great
personages do to the executioners, "Friend, do your work
as quick as you can." They tell me of wine to keep it out of my
stomach; but I will starve temperance itself; I will be virtuous
indeed--that is, I will stick to virtue, though I find it is not
its own reward.

This confinement has kept me from Yorkshire; I hope, however, to
be at Ragley by the 20th, from whence I shall still go to Lord
Strafford's and by this delay you may possibly be at Greatworth
by my return, which will be about the beginning of September.
Write me a line as soon as you receive this; direct it to
Arlington Street, it will be sent after me. Adieu.

P. S. My tower erects its battlements bravely; my Anecdotes of
Painting thrive exceedingly: thanks to the gout, that has pinned
me to my chair: think of Ariel the sprite in a slit shoe!

Letter 40 To The Countess Of Ailesbury.(90)
Whichnovre, August 23, 1760. (page 81)

Well, madam, if I had known whither I was coming, I would not
have come alone! Mr. Conway and your ladyship should have come
too. Do you know, this is the individual manor-house,(91) where
married ladies may have a flitch of bacon upon the easiest terms
in the world? I should have expected that the owners would be
ruined in satisfying the conditions of the obligation, and that
the park would be stocked with hogs instead of deer. On the
contrary, it is thirty years since the flitch was claimed, and
Mr. Offley was never so near losing one as when you and Mr.
Conway were at Ragley. He so little expects the demand, that the
flitch is only hung in effigie over the hall chimney, carved in
wood. Are not you ashamed, Madam, never to have put in your
claim? It is above a year and a day that you have been married,
and I never once heard either of you mention a journey to
Whichnovre. If you quarrelled at loo every night, you could not
quit your pretensions with more indifference. I had a great mind
to take my oath, as one of your witnesses, that you neither of
you would, if you were at liberty, prefer any body else, ne
fairer ne fouler, and I could easily get twenty persons to swear
the same. Therefore, unless you will let the world be convinced,
that all your apparent harmony is counterfeit, you must set out
immediately for Mr. Offley's, or at least send me a letter of
attorney to claim the flitch in your names; and I will send it up
by the coach, to be left at the Blue Boar, or wherever you will
have it delivered. But you had better come in person; you will
see one of the prettiest spots in the world; it is a little
paradise, and the more like the antique one, as, by all I have
said, the married couple seems to be driven out of it. The house
is very indifferent: behind is a pretty park; the situation, a
brow of a hill commanding sweet meadows, through which the Trent
serpentizes in numberless windings and branches. The spires of
the cathedral of Litchfield are in front at a distance, with
variety of other steeples, seats, and farms, and the horizon
bounded by rich hills covered with blue woods. If you love a
prospect, or bacon, you will certainly come hither.

Wentworth Castle, Sunday night.

I had writ thus far yesterday, but had no opportunity of sending
my letter. I arrived here last night, and found only the Duke of
Devonshire, who went to Hardwicke this morning: they were down at
the menagerie, and there was a clean little pullet, with which I
thought his grace looked as if he should be glad to eat a slice
of Whichnovre bacon. We follow him to Chatsworth tomorrow, and
make our entry to the public dinner, to the disagreeableness of
which I fear even Lady Mary's company will not reconcile me.

My Gothic building, which tiny lord Strafford has executed in the
menagerie, has a charming effect. There are two bridges built
besides; but the new front is very little advanced. Adieu,
Madam!

(90) Daughter of the Duke of Argyle, first married to the Earl of
Ailesbury, and afterwards to the Hon. H. S. Conway.

(91) Of Whichnovre, near Litchfield. Sir Philip de Somerville,
in the 10th of Edward III., held the manor of Whichnovre, etc. of
the Earls of Lancaster, lords of the honour of Tutbury, upon two
small fees, but also upon condition of his keeping ready
"arrayed, at all time of the year but Lent, one bacon flyke
hanging in his hall at Whichnovre, to be given to every man or
woman who demanded it a year and a day after the marriage upon
their swearing they would not have changed for none other, fairer
nor fouler, richer nor poorer, nor for no other descended of a
great lineage, sleeping nor waking, at no time," etc.-E.

Letter 41 To Sir Horace Mann.
Chatsworth, Aug. 28, 1760. (page 82)

I am a great way out of the world, and yet enough in the way of
news to send you a good deal. I have been here but two or three
days, and it has rained expresses. The most important
intelligence I can give you is that I was stopped from coming
into the north for ten days by a fit of the gout in both feet,
but as I have a tolerable quantity of resolution, I am now
running about with the children and climbing hills--and I intend
to have only just as much of this wholesome evil as shall carry
me to a hundred. The next point of consequence is, that the Duke
of Cumberland has had a stroke of the palsy-- As his courage is
at least equal to mine, he makes nothing of it; but being above
an inch more in the girth than I am, he is not Yet arrived at
skipping about the house. In truth, his case is melancholy: the
humours that have fallen upon the wound in his leg have kept him
lately from all exercise-. as he used much, and is so corpulent,
this must have bad consequences. Can one but pity him? A hero,
reduced by injustice to crowd all his fame into the supporting
bodily ills, and to looking upon the approach of a lingering
death with fortitude, is a real object of compassion. How he
must envy, what I am sure I don't, his cousin of Prussia risking
his life every hour against Cossacks and Russians! Well! but this
risker has scrambled another victory: he has beat that pert
pretender Laudon(92)--yet it looks to me as if he was but new
gilding his coffin; the undertaker Daun will, I fear, still have
the burying of him!

I received here your letter of the 9th, and am glad Dr. Perelli
so far justifies Sisson as to disculpate me. I trust I shall
execute Sophia's business better.

Stosch dined with me at Strawberry before I set out. He is a
very rational creature. I return homewards to-morrow; my
campaigns are never very long; I have great curiosity for seeing
places, but I despatch it soon, and am always impatient to be
back with my own Woden and Thor, my own Gothic Lares. While the
lords and ladies are at skittles, I just found a moment to write
you a line. Adieu!

Arlington Street, Sept. 1.

I had no opportunity of sending my letter to the secretary's
office, so brought it myself. You will see in the Gazette
another little victory of a Captain Byron over a whole diminutive
French squadron. Stosch has had a fever. He is now going to
establish himself at Salisbury.

(92) This was the battle of Licgnitz, fought on the 15th of
August, 1760, and in which the King of Prussia signally defeated
the Austrians under Marshal Laudon, and thereby saved Silesia.-D.

Letter 42 To George Montagu, Esq.
Arlington Street, September 1, 1760. (page 83)

I was disappointed at your not being at home as I returned from
my expedition; and now I fear it must be another year before I
see Greatworth, as I have two or three more engagements on my
books for the residue of this season. I go next week to Lord
Waldegrave, and afterwards to George Selwyn, and shall return by
Bath, which I have never yet seen. Will not you and the general
come to Strawberry in October?

Thank you for your lamentations on my gout; it was, in proportion
to my size, very slender--my feet are again as small as ever they
were. When I had what I called big shoes, I could have danced a
minuet on a silver penny.

My tour has been extremely agreeable. I set out with winning a
good deal at loo at Ragley; the Duke of Grafton was not so
successful. and had some high words with Pam. I went from thence
to Offley's at Whichnovre, the individual manor of the flitch of
bacon, which has been growing rusty for these thirty years in his
hall. I don't wonder; I have no notion that one could keep in
good humour with one's wife for a year and a day, unless one was
to live on the very spot, which is one of the sweetest scenes I
ever saw. It is the brink of a high hill; the Trent wriggles
through at the foot; Litchfield and twenty other churches and
mansions decorate the view. Mr. Anson has bought an estate close
by, whence my lord used to cast many a wishful eye, though
without the least pretensions even to a bit of lard.

I saw Litchfield cathedral, which has been rich, but my friend
Lord Brook and his soldiery treated poor St. Chadd(93) with so
little ceremony, that it is in a most naked condition. In a
niche ,it the very summit they have crowded a statue of Charles
the Second, with a special pair of shoo-strings, big enough for a
weathercock. As I went to Lord Strafford's I passed through
Sheffield, which is one of the foulest towns in England in the
most charming situation there are two-and-twenty thousand
inhabitants making knives and scissors; they remit eleven
thousand pounds a week to London. One man there has discovered
the art of plating copper with silver; I bought a pair of
candlesticks for two guineas that are quite pretty. Lord
Strafford has erected the little Gothic building, which I got Mr.
Bentley to draw; I took the idea from Chichester-cross. It
stands on a high bank in the menagerie, between a pond and a
vale, totally bowered over with oaks. I went with the Straffords
to Chatsworth, and stayed there four days; there were Lady Mary
Coke, Lord Besborough and his daughters, Lord Thomond, Mr.
Boufoy, the Duke, the old Duchess,(94) and two of his brothers.
Would you believe that nothing was ever better humoured than the
ancient grace? She stayed every evening till it was dark in the
skittle-ground, keeping the score: and one night, that the
servants had a ball for Lady Dorothy'S(95) birthday, we fetched
the fiddler into the drawing-room, and the dowager herself danced
with us! I never was more disappointed than at Chatsworth, which,
ever since I was born, I have condemned. It is a glorious
situation; the vale rich in corn and verdure, vast woods hang
down the hills, which are green to the top, and the immense rocks
only serve to dignify the prospect. The river runs before the
door, and serpentizes more than you can conceive in the vale.
The duke is widening it, and will make it the middle of his park;
but I don't approve an idea they are going to execute, of a fine
bridge with statues under a noble cliff. If they will have a
bridge (which by the way will crowd the scene), it should be
composed of rude fragments, such as the giant of the Peak would
step upon, that he might not be wet-shod. The expense of the
works now carrying on will amount to forty thousand pounds. A
heavy quadrangle of stables is part of the plan,. is very
cumbrous, and standing higher than the house, is ready to
overwhelm it. The principal front of the house is beautiful, and
executed with the neatness of wrought-plate; the inside is most
sumptuous, but did not please me; the heathen gods, goddesses,
Christian virtues, and allegoric gentlefolks, are crowded into
every room, as if Mrs. Holman had been in heaven and invited
every body she saw. The great apartment is first; painted
ceilings, inlaid floors, and unpainted wainscots make every room
sombre. The tapestries are fine, but, not fine enough, and there
are few portraits. The chapel is charming. The great jet d'eau
I like, nor would I remove it; whatever is magnificent of the
kind in the time it was done, I would retain,
else all gardens and houses wear a tiresome resemblance. I
except that absurdity of a cascade tumbling down marble steps,
which reduces the steps to be of no use at all. I saw
Haddon,(96) an abandoned old castle of the Rutlands, in a
romantic situation, but which never could have composed a
tolerable dwelling. The Duke sent Lord John with me to
Hardwicke, where I was again disappointed; but I will not take
relations from others; they either don't see for themselves, or
can't see for me. How I had been promised that I should be
charmed with Hardwicke, and told that the Devonshires ought to
have established there! never was I less charmed in my life. The
house is not Gothic, but of that betweenity, that intervened when
Gothic declined and Palladian was creeping in--rather, this is
totally naked of either. It has vast chambers--aye, vast, such
as the nobility of that time delighted in, and did not know how
to furnish. The great apartment is exactly what it was when the
Queen of @Scots was kept there. Her council-chamber, the
council-chamber of a poor woman, who had only two secretaries, a
gentleman usher, an apothecary, a confessor, and three maids, is
so outrageously spacious, that you would take it for King
David's, who thought, contrary to all modern experience, that in
the multitude of counsellors there is wisdom. At the upper
end is the state, with a long table, covered with a sumptuous
cloth, embroidered and embossed with gold, -at least what was
gold: so are all the tables. Round the top of the chamber runs a
monstrous frieze, ten or twelve feet deep, representing
stag-hunting in miserable plastered relief. The next is her
dressing-room, hung with patchwork on black velvet; then her
state bedchamber. The bed has been rich beyond description, and
now hangs in costly golden tatters. The hangings, part of which
they say her Majesty worked, are composed of figures as large as
life, sewed and embroidered on black velvet, white satin, etc.
and represent the virtues that were necessary for her, or that
she was forced to have, as patience and temperance, etc. The
fire-screens are particular; pieces of yellow velvet, fringed
with gold, hang on a cross-bar of wood, which is fixed on the top
of a single stick, that rises from the foot. The only furniture
which has any appearance of taste are the table and cabinets,
which are all of oak, richly carved. There is a privata chamber
within, where she lay, her arms and style over the door; the
arras hangs over all the doors; the gallery is sixty yards long,
covered with bad tapestry, and wretched pictures of Mary herself,
Elizabeth in a gown of sea-monsters, Lord Darnley, James the
Fifth and his Queen, curious, and a whole history of Kings of
England, not worth sixpence apiece. There is an original of old
Bess(97) of Hardwicke herself, who built the house. Her estates
were then reckoned at sixty thousand pounds a-year, and now let
for two hundred thousand pounds. Lord John Cavendish told me,
that the tradition in the family was that it had been prophesied
to her that she should never die as long as she was building; and
that at last she died in a hard frost, when the labourers could
not work. There is a fine bank of old oaks in the park over a
lake; nothing else pleased me there. However, I was so diverted
with this old beldam and her magnificence, that I made this
epitaph for her: