Books: Peck\'s Bad Boy With the Cowboys
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Peck's Bad Boy With the Cowboys
[Illustration: "Dog does kinder act as though he had something on
his mind."]
PECK'S BAD BOY WITH THE COWBOYS
BY HON. GEO. W. PECK.
Author of Peck's Bad Boy Abroad, Peck's Bad Boy with the Circus,
etc.
Relating the Amusing Experiences and Laughable Incidents of this
Strenuous American Boy and his Pa while among the Cowboys and
Indians in the Far West. Exciting Hunts and Adventures mingled
with Humorous Situations and Laugh Provoking Events.
FULLY ILLUSTRATED
CHICAGO
JOHN R. STANTON CO.
PUBLISHERS
COPYRIGHT 1905
BY
JOSEPH B. BOWLES
COPYRIGHT 1906
BY
JOSEPH B. BOWLES
COPYRIGHT 1907
BY
THOMPSON & THOMAS
MADE IN U. S. A.
ILLUSTRATIONS.
"Got Any Trailing Dogs?" Frontispiece
Pa Kicked the Dog
The Grizzly Looked as Big as a Brewery Horse
They Gave Pa Three Cheers
The Squaws Seemed to be Worshipping Pa
The Horse Stumbled, Throwing Pa Over His Head and Killing the
Wolf
He Looked Like Moonlight on the Lake
The Chiefs Knees Knocked Together
Pa Only Touched the High Places
A Boy Dinosaurus Reached Out His Neck and Picked Up a Steer
We Were Captured by the Curry's Gang
Pa Told Them About the Wave of Reform
Say to the Engineer--"Charley, Turn Her Off and Stop Her"
One Day the Robbers Came Back From a Raid With Piles of
Greenbacks
Drank to the Health of Their Distinguished Guest
The Robbers Guided Us in the Dark Through the Valley
The Pony Tossed Pa in the Air
Pa Swung His Ax Handle
Pa Was Alive to His Danger
The Buffaloes Licked Pa's Bald Head--Pa Began to Pray
A Couple of Bouncers Took Pa by the Elbows and Fired Him Out
"Dog Does Kinder Act as Though He Had Something on His Mind"
"Jerusalem, But You Are a Sight," Said the Old Groceryman
Dad Said, "Good Shot, Hennery"
"It Rained Bananas and the Dago Came Down on His Head"
"The Farmer Had Grabbed Hold of a Wire Sign Across the Street"
"Hennery, This Attempt on Your Part to Murder Me Was Not the
Success You Expected"
"Dad Sat in the Parlor With a Widow Until the Porter Had to Tell
Him to Cut it Out"
"I Got a Gambler to Look Cross at Dad"
"Dad Was Up On a Limb and the Wild Animals Were Jumping Up to Eat
His Shoes"
"Hennery, I Feel as Though Your Dad Was Not Long For This World"
Dad Among the Cowboys
"Dad Began to Pose as a Regular Old Rough Rider"
Dad On a Bucking Broncho
"That's a Prairie Dog From Texas"
"Dad Heard Something at Night and Rose Up in Bed"
"Dad Stepped On My Prairie Dog and Yelled Murder"
"We Left Under Escort of the Police"
"Arrest That Boy With the Rattlesnake," Said the Groceryman
"Each Oyster Was As Big As a Pie Plate"
Landed With His Head in a Basket of Strictly Fresh Eggs
"You Ought to Have Seen Dad's Short Legs Carry Him to a Tree"
"Studied the Bears for Awhile and Let Dad Yell for the Police"
Come to Present Arms
When the Fireworks Went Off in the Grocery
"Dad Said if Rockefeller Could Raise Hair by the Sunshine Method,
He Could"
CHAPTER I.
The Bad Boy and His Pa Go West--Pa Plans to Be a Dead Ringer for
Buffalo Bill--They Visit an Indian Reservation and Pa Has an
Encounter with a Grizzly Bear.
Well, I never saw such a change in a man as there has been in pa,
since the circus managers gave him a commission to go out west and
hire an entire outfit for a wild west show, regardless of cost, to
be a part of our show next year. He acts like he was a duke,
searching for a rich wife. No country politician that never had
been out of his own county, appointed minister to England, could
put on more style than Pa does.
The first day after the show left us at St. Louis we felt pretty
bum, 'cause we missed the smell of the canvas, and the sawdust,
and the animals, and the indescribable odor that goes with a
circus. We missed the performers, the band, the surging crowds
around the ticket wagon, and the cheers from the seats. It almost
seemed as though there had been a funeral in the family, and we
were sitting around in the cold parlor waiting for the lawyers to
read the will. But in a couple of days Pa got busy, and he hired a
young Indian who was a graduate of Carlisle, as an interpreter,
and a reformed cowboy, to go with us to the cattle ranges, and an
old big game hunter who was to accompany us to the places where we
could find buffalo and grizzly bears. Pa chartered a car to take
us west, and after the Indian and the cowboy and the hunter got
sobered up, on the train, and got the St. Louis ptomaine poison
out of their systems, and we were going through Kansas, Pa got us
all into the smoking compartment.
"Gentlemen," he said, "I want you to know that this expedition is
backed by the wealth of the circus world, and that there is
nothing cheap about it. We are to hire, regardless of expense, the
best riders, the best cattle ropers, and the best everything that
goes with a wild west show. We all know that Buffalo Bill must
soon, in the nature of things, pass away as a feature for shows,
and I have been selected to take the place of Bill in the circus
world, when he cashes in. You may have noticed that I have been
letting my hair and mustache and chin whiskers grow the last few
months, so that next year I will be a dead ringer for Bill. All I
want is some experience as a hero of the plains, as a scout, a
hunter, a scalper of Indians, a rider of wild horses, and a few
things like that, and next year you will see me ride a white horse
up in front of the press seats in our show, take off my broad-
brimmed hat, and wave it at the crowned heads in the boxes, give
the spurs to my horse, and ride away like a cavalier, and the show
will go on, to the music of hand-clapping from the assembled
thousands, see?"
The cowboy looked at pa's stomach, and said: "Well, Mr. Man, if
you are going to blow yourself for a second Buffalo Bill, I am
with you, at the salary agreed upon, till the cows come home, but
you have got to show me that you have got no yellow streak, when
it comes to cutting out steers that are wild and carry long horns,
and you've got to rope 'em, and tie 'em all alone, and hold up
your hands for judgment, in ten seconds."
Pa said he could learn to do it in a week, but the cowman said:
"Not on your life." The hunter said he would be ready to call pa
B. Bill when he could stand up straight, with the paws of a full-
grown grizzly on each of his shoulders, and its face in front of
pa's, if Pa had the nerve to pull a knife and disembowel the bear,
and skin him without help. Pa said that would be right into his
hand, 'cause he use to work in a slaughter house when he was a
boy, and he had waded in gore.
The Indian said he would be ready to salute Pa as Buffalo Bill the
Second, when Pa had an Indian's left hand tangled in his hair, and
a knife in his right hand ready to scalp him, if Pa would look the
Indian in the eye and hypnotize the red man so he would drop the
hair and the knife, turn his back on pa, and invite him to his
wigwam as a guest. Pa said all he asked was a chance to look into
the very soul of the worst Indian that ever stole a horse, and he
would make Mr. Indian penuk, and beg for mercy.
And we all agreed that Pa was a wonder, and then they got out a
pack of cards and played draw poker awhile. Pa had bad luck, and
when the Indian bet a lot of chips, Pa began to look the Indian
in the eye, and the Indian began to quail, and Pa put up all the
chips he had, to bluff the Indian, but Pa took his eye off the
Indian a minute too quick, and the Indian quit quailing, and bet
Pa $70, and Pa called him, and the Indian had four deuces and pa
had a full hand, and the Indian took the money. Pa said that comes
of educating these confounded red devils, at the expense of the
government, and then we all went to bed.
The next morning we were at the station in the far west. We got
off and started for the Indian reservation where the Carlisle
Indian originally came from, and where we were to hire Indians for
our show. We rode about 40 miles in hired buckboards, and just as
the sun was Setting there appeared in the distance an Indian
camp, where smoke ascended from tepees, tents and bark houses.
When the civilized Carlisle Indian jumped up on the front seat of
the buckboard and gave a series of yells that caused pa's bald
head to look ashamed that it had no hair to stand on end, there
came a war whoop from the camp, Indians, squaws, dogs, and
everything that contained a noise letting out yells that made me
sick. The Carlisle Indian began to pull off his citizen clothes of
civilization, and when the horses ran down to the camp in front of
the chief's tent the tribes welcomed the Carlisle prodigal son,
who had removed every evidence of civilization, except a pair of
football pants, and thus he reinstated himself with the affections
of his race, who hugged him for joy.
Pa and the rest of us sat in the buckboard while the Indians began
to feast on something cooking in a shack. We looked at each other
for awhile, not daring to make a noise for fear it would offend
the Indians. Pretty soon an old chief came and called Pa the Great
Father, and called me a pup, and he invited us to come into camp
and partake of the feast.
Well, we were hungry, and the meat certainly tasted good, and the
Carlisle civilized Indian had no business to say it was dog,
'cause no man likes to smoke his pipe of peace with strong tobacco
in a strange pipe, and feel that his stomach is full of dog meat.
But we didn't die, and all the evening the Indians talked about
the brave great father.
It seemed that they were not going to take much stock in pa's
bravery until they had tried him out in Indian fashion. We were
standing in the moonlight surrounded by Indians, and Pa had been
questioned as to his bravery, and Pa said he was brave like
Roosevelt, and he swelled out his chest and looked the part, when
the chief said, pointing to a savage, snarling dog that was
smelling of pa: "Brave man, kick a dog!"
We all told Pa that the Indian wanted Pa to give an exhibition of
his bravery by kicking the dog, and while I could see that Pa had
rather hire a man to kick the dog, he knew that it was up to him
to show his mettle, so he hauled off and gave the dog a kick near
the tail, which seemed to telescope the dog's spine together, and
the dog landed far away. The chief patted Pa on the shoulder and
said: "Great Father, bully good hero. Tomorrow he kill a grizzly,"
and then they let us go to bed, after Pa had explained that if
everything went well he would hire all the chiefs and young braves
for his show.
[Illustration: Pa Kicked the Dog.]
After we got to bed Pa said he was almost sorry he told the chief
that he would take a grizzly bear by one ear, and cuff the other
ear with the flat of his hand, as he didn't know but a wild
grizzly would look upon such conduct differently from our old bear
in the show used to. Any person around the show could slap his
face, or cuff him, or kick him in the slats, and he would act as
though they were doing him a favor. The big game hunter told pa
that there was no danger in hunting a grizzly, as you could scare
him away, if you didn't want to have any truck with him, by waving
your hat and yelling: "Git, Ephraim." He said no grizzly would
stand around a minute if you yelled at him. Pa made up his mind he
would yell all right enough, if we came up to a grizzly.
Well, we didn't sleep much that night, 'cause Pa kept practicing
on his yell to scare a grizzly, for fear he would forget the
words, and when they called us in the morning Pa was the poorest
imitation of a man going out to test his bravery that I ever saw.
While the Indians were getting ready to go out to a canyon and
turn the dogs loose to round up a bear, Pa got a big knife and was
sharpening it, so he could rip the bear from Genesis to
Revelations. After breakfast the chief and the Carlisle Indian,
and the big game hunter, and the cowman and I went out about two
miles, to the mouth of the canyon, where it was very narrow, and
they stationed Pa by a big rock, right where the bear would have
to pass; the rest of us got up on a bench of the canyon, where we
could see Pa be brave, and the young Indians went up about a mile,
and started the dogs. Well, Pa was a sight, as he stood there
waiting for the bear, so he could cuff its ears, and rip it open,
right in sight of the chief, and skin it; but he was nervous, and
we could see that his legs trembled when he heard the dogs bark up
the canyon. I yelled to Pa to think of Teddy Roosevelt, and Daniel
Boone, and Buffalo Bill, and set his teeth so they would not
chatter and scare the bear, but Pa yelled back: "Never you mind, I
will kill my bear in my own way, but you can make up your mind to
have bear meat for supper."
Pretty soon the big game hunter said: "There he comes, sure's you
are born," and we looked up the canyon, and there was something
coming, as big as a load of hay, with bristles sticking up a foot
high on its back, and its mouth was open, and it was loping right
towards pa. Gee, but I was proud of pa, to see him sharpening his
knife on his boot leg, but when the great animal got within about
a block of pa, the great father seemed to have a streak of yellow,
for he dropped his knife and yelled: "Git, Ephraim," in a loud
voice, but Ephraim came right along, and didn't git with any
great suddenness. When the bear got within about four doors of
Pa, he saw the great father, and stood up on his hind legs, and
looked as big as a brewery horse, and he opened his mouth and
said: "Woof," just like that. That was too much for my Pa, who
began to shuck his clothes, and then started on a run towards the
mouth of the canyon. The bear looked around as much as to say:
"Well, what do you think of that?" and we watched Pa sprinting
toward the Indian camp like a scared wolf.
[Illustration: The Grilly Looked as Big as a Brewery Horse.]
The big game hunter put a few bullets in the bear where they
would do the most good, and killed it, and we went down in the
canyon and skinned it, and took the meat and hide to camp, where
we found Pa under a bed in a squaw's tepee, making grand hailing
signs of distress, and trying to tell them about his killing a
bear by letting it run after him, so it would tire itself out and
die of heart failure.
When we found Pa he had come out from under the bed, and was
looking at the hide of the bear to find the place where he hit it
with the knife, as he said he could see that the only chance for
him to kill the bear was to throw the knife at it from a distance,
'cause the bear was four times as big as any bear he had ever
killed. Pa took out a handful of gold pieces and distributed them
among the Indians, and told the Carlisle Indian to explain to the
tribe that the great father had killed the bear by hypnotism, and
they all believed it except the chief, who seemed skeptical, for
he said: "Great father heap brave man like a sheep. Go play seven-
up with squaws." Poor Pa wasn't allowed to talk with the men all
day, 'cause the old chief said he was a squaw man. Pa says they
don't seem to realize that a man can be brave unless he allows
himself to be killed by a bear, but he says he will show them that
a great mind and a great head is better in the end than
foolishness. Now they want Pa to run a footrace with the young
Indians, as the record he made getting to camp ahead of the bear
is better than any time ever made on the reservation.
CHAPTER II.
Indian Chief Compels Bad Boy's Pa to Herd with the Squaws--He
Shows Them How to Make Buckwheat Cakes and Is Kept Making Them a
Week--He Talks to the Squaws About Women's Rights and They
Organize a Strike--Pa's Success in a Wolf Hunt--The Strike is Put
Down and the Indians Prepare to Burn Pa at the Stake.
Since Pa's experience in trying to kill a grizzly by making the
animal chase him and die of heart disease, the chief has made Pa
herd with the squaws, until he can prove that he is a brave man by
some daring deed. The Indians wouldn't speak to him for a long
time, so he decided to teach the squaws how to keep house in a
civilized manner, and he began by trying to show them how to make
buckwheat pancakes, so they could furnish something for the
Indians to eat that does not have to be dug out of a tin can,
which they draw from the Indian agent. Pa found a sack of
buckwheat flour and some baking powder, and mixed up some batter,
and while he was fixing a piece of tin roof for a griddle, the
squaws drank the pancake batter raw, and it made them all sick,
and the chief was going to have Pa burned at the stake, when the
Carlisle Indian who had eaten pancakes at college when he was
training with the football team, told the chief to let up on Pa
and he would give them something to eat that was good, so Pa mixed
some more batter and when the buckwheat pancakes began to bake,
and the odor spread around among the Indians, they all gathered
around, and the way they ate pancakes would paralyze you. They got
some axle grease to spread on the pancakes, and fought with each
other to get the pancakes, and they kept Pa baking pancakes all
day and nearly all night, and then the squaws began to feel
better, and Pa had to bake pancakes for them, and when the flour
gave out the chief sent to the agency for more, and for a week pa
did nothing but make pancakes, but finally the whole tribe got
sick, and Pa had to prescribe raw beef for them, and they began to
get better, and then they wanted Pa to go on a coyote hunt, and
kill a kiota, which is a wolf, by jumping off his horse and taking
the wolf by the neck and choking it to death. Pa said he killed a
tom cat that way once, and he could kill any wolf that ever
walked, so they arranged the hunt Before we went on the hunt pa
sent to Cheyenne for two dozen little folding baby trundlers for
the squaws to wheel the papooses in, 'cause he didn't like to see
them tie the children on their backs and carry them around. Where
the trundlers came Pa showed the squaws how they worked, by
putting a papoose in one of the baby wagons, and pushing it around
the camp, and by gosh, if they didn't make Pa wheel all the babies
in the tribe, for two days, and the Indians turned out and gave
the great father three cheers, but when the squaws wanted to get
in the wagons and be wheeled around, Pa kicked. After teaching the
squaws how to put the children in the wagons and work them, we
went off on the hunt, and when we came back every squaw had her
papoose in a baby wagon, but instead of wheeling the wagon in
civilised fashion, they slung the wagons, babies and all, on their
backs, and carried the whole thing on their backs. Gee, but that
made Pa hot. He says you can't do anything with a race of people
that haven't got brain enough to imitate. He says monkeys would
know better than to carry baby wagons on their backs. I never
thought that Indians could be jealous, but they are terrors when
the jealousy germ begins to work. There is no doubt but that the
squaws got to thinking a great deal of pa, 'cause he talked with
them, through the Carlisle Indian for an interpreter, and as he
sat on a camp chair and looked like a great white god with a red
nose, and they gathered around him, and he told them stories of
women in the east, and how they dressed and went to parties, and
how the men worked for them that they might live in luxury, and
how they had servants to do their cooking, and maids to dress
them, and carriages to ride in, and lovers to slave for them, it
is not to be wondered at that those poor creatures, who never had
a kind word from their masters, and who were looked upon as lower
than the dogs, should look upon Pa as the grandest man that ever
lived, and I noticed, myself, that they gave him glances of love
and admiration, and when they would snuggle up closer to pa, he
would put his hand on their heads and pat their hair, and look
into their big black eyes sort of tender, and pinch their brown
cheeks, and chuck them under the chin, and tell them that the
great father loved them, and that he hoped the time would come
when every good Indian would look upon his squaw, the mother of
his children, as the greatest boon that could be given to man, and
that the now despised squaw would be placed on a pedestal and
honored by all, and worshiped as she ought to be.
[Illustration: The Squaws Seemed to Be Worshiping Pa.]
That was all right enough, but Pa never ought to have gone so far
as to advise them to strike for their rights, and refuse to be
longer looked upon as beasts of burden, but demand recognition as
equals, and refuse longer to be drudges. I could see that trouble
was brewing, for every squaw insisted on kissing the great father,
and then there came a baneful light in their eyes, and they drew
away together and began to talk excitedly, and Pa said he guessed
they were organizing a woman's rights union. Pa and the Carlisle
Indian and I went out for a stroll in the forest, and were gone an
hour or so, and Pa got tired and he and I went back to camp before
the Carlisle Indian did, and when we got in sight of camp we could
see by the commotion that the squaw strike was on, 'cause the
squaws were talking loud and the Indians were getting their guns
and it looked like war. We crawled up close, and the squaws drew
butcher knives and made a rush on the Indians, and the Indians
weakened, and the squaws tied their hands and feet, and then the
squaws had a war dance, and they told the Indians that they were
now the bosses, and would hereafter run the affairs of the tribe,
like white women did, and that the Indians must do the cooking,
and do the work, while the squaws sat in the tents to be waited
on, and that they would never do another stroke of hard work that
an Indian could do. I never saw such a lot of scared Indians in my
life, but when the squaws put the butcher knives to their necks,
and looked fierce, and grabbed the Indians by the hair and looked
as though they were going to scalp them, the Indians agreed to do
all the work, and just then Pa and I came up, and the squaws
hailed Pa as their deliverer, and they fell on his neck and hugged
him, and they placed a camp chair for him, and put a tiger skin
cloak around him, and a necklace of elk's teeth around his neck,
and all kneeled down and seemed to be worshiping him, while the
Indians looked on in the most hopeless manner, and then the
Carlisle Indian came and said the squaws had made Pa the chief
squaw of the tribe, and that the Indians had agreed to do the work
hereafter. Pa counted the elk teeth on his necklace and figured
that he could sell them for two dollars apiece, and pay the
expenses of the trip. Then the squaws cut the strings that bound
the Indians, and set them to work cooking dinner, and it was awful
the way the spirit seemed to be knocked out of the Indians, just
by a little rising on the part of the downtrodden squaws. The
Indians cooked dinner, and waited on the squaws, and Pa and all of
us whites, and after dinner the squaws ordered the horses and the
squaws and us whites went off on a wolf hunt, with the dogs,
where Pa was to show his bravery to the squaws instead of the
Indians. The squaws gave Pa the old chief's horse, and the best
one in the tribe, and leaving the chief to wash the dishes, and
the Indians to clean up the camp, and clean some fish for supper,
the victorious squaws with Pa at the head, and the rest of us
whites on ponies, went out on the mesa and turned the dogs loose,
and pretty soon they were after a wolf and Pa led out ahead on his
racing pony, cheered by the yells of the squaws, and it was a fine
race for about two miles. Pa and the cowboy and the big game
hunter and I got ahead of the squaws, and after awhile we got up
pretty near to the wolf, and the big game hunter said to pa: "Now,
old man, is your chance to make yourself solid with the squaws.
We will hold hack and when the dogs get the wolf surrounded you
rush in and kill him or your name's Dennis." Pa said: "You watch
my smoke, and see me eat that wolf alive." So we held up our
horses, and let Pa go ahead. He rode up to the wolf, and I never
saw a man with such luck as Pa had. Just as he got near the wolf
and the animal showed his teeth, Pa tried to steer his horse away
from the savage animal, but the horse stumbled in a prairie dog
hole, and fell right on top of the wolf, crushing the life out of
the animal, and throwing Pa over his head. Pa was stunned, but he
soon came to, and when he realized that the wolf was dead, he
grabbed the animal by the neck with one hand, and by the lower jaw
with the other, and held on to it till the crowd came up, and
when the squaws saw that Pa had killed the biggest wolf ever seen
on the reservation, by rushing in single handed and choking the
savage animal to death, they gave Pa an ovation that was enough to
turn the head of any man. Us white fellows knew that Pa couldn't
have been hired to go near that wolf until the horse fell on it
and killed it, but we wanted to give Pa a reputation for bravery,
and so we let the squaws compliment Pa and hug him, and make him
think he was a holy terror. So they tied the wolf on the saddle in
front of pa, and we all went back to camp, the squaws shouting for
pa, and telling the Indians how the great white father had
strangled the father of all wolves, and then the Indians served
the fish supper, and all looked as though there had been a
bloodless revolution, and that the squaws were in charge of the
government, and Pa was "it," but I could see the Carlisle Indian
whispering to the Indians, and it seemed to me I could see signs
of an uprising, and when the Indians had the supper dishes washed,
and all seemed going right, and the squaws were rejoicing at being
emancipated, just as the sun was setting, every Indian pulled out
a bull whip and began to lash the squaws to their tents, and some
young braves grabbed Pa and removed the leopard skin cloak, and
the elk's teeth necklace, and tied his hands and feet, and carried
him into a circle made by the Indians. I asked the Carlisle Indian
what was the matter, and he said, pointing to some wood that had
been piled at the roots of a tree: "The great white father is
going to be tried for inciting a rebellion among the squaws, and
the chances are that before the sun shall rise tomorrow your old
dad will be broiled, fricasseed and baked to a turn." I went up
to Pa and said: "Gee, dad, but they are going to burn you at the
stake," and Pa called the cowboy, and told him to ride to the
military post and ask for a detail of soldiers to hurry up and put
a stop to it, and then Pa said to me: "Hennery, it may look as
though I was in a tight place, but I place my trust in the squaws
and soldiers," and Pa rolled over to take a nap.
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