Books: Androcles and the Lion
G >>
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW >> Androcles and the Lion
LAVINIA. Blessing, Caesar, and forgiveness!
CAESAR (turning in some surprise at the salutation) There is no
forgiveness for Christianity.
LAVINIA. I did not mean that, Caesar. I mean that WE forgive YOU.
METELLUS. An inconceivable liberty! Do you not know, woman, that
the Emperor can do no wrong and therefore cannot be forgiven?
LAVINIA. I expect the Emperor knows better. Anyhow, we forgive
him.
THE CHRISTIANS. Amen!
CAESAR. Metellus: you see now the disadvantage of too much
severity. These people have no hope; therefore they have nothing
to restrain them from saying what they like to me. They are
almost as impertinent as the gladiators. Which is the Greek
sorcerer?
ANDROCLES (humbly touching his forelock) Me, your Worship.
CAESAR. My Worship! Good! A new title. Well, what miracles can
you perform?
ANDROCLES. I can cure warts by rubbing them with my tailor's
chalk; and I can live with my wife without beating her.
CAESAR. Is that all?
ANDROCLES. You don't know her, Caesar, or you wouldn't say that.
CAESAR. Ah, well, my friend, we shall no doubt contrive a happy
release for you. Which is Ferrovius?
FERROVIUS. I am he.
CAESAR. They tell me you can fight.
FERROVIUS. It is easy to fight. I can die, Caesar.
CAESAR. That is still easier, is it not?
FERROVIUS. Not to me, Caesar. Death comes hard to my flesh; and
fighting comes very easily to my spirit (beating his breast and
lamenting) O sinner that I am! (He throws himself down on the
steps, deeply discouraged).
CAESAR. Metellus: I should like to have this man in the Pretorian
Guard.
METELLUS. I should not, Caesar. He looks a spoilsport. There are
men in whose presence it is impossible to have any fun: men who
are a sort of walking conscience. He would make us all
uncomfortable.
CAESAR. For that reason, perhaps, it might be well to have him.
An Emperor can hardly have too many consciences. (To Ferrovius)
Listen, Ferrovius. (Ferrovius shakes his head and will not look
up). You and your friends shall not be outnumbered to-day in the
arena. You shall have arms; and there will be no more than one
gladiator to each Christian. If you come out of the arena alive,
I will consider favorably any request of yours, and give you a
place in the Pretorian Guard. Even if the request be that no
questions be asked about your faith I shall perhaps not refuse
it.
FERROVIUS. I will not fight. I will die. Better stand with the
archangels than with the Pretorian Guard.
CAESAR. I cannot believe that the archangels--whoever they may
be--would not prefer to be recruited from the Pretorian Guard.
However, as you please. Come: let us see the show.
As the Court ascends the steps, Secutor and the Retiarius return
from the arena through the passage; Secutor covered with dust and
very angry: Retiarius grinning.
SECUTOR. Ha, the Emperor. Now we shall see. Caesar: I ask you
whether it is fair for the Retiarius, instead of making a fair
throw of his net at me, to swish it along the ground and throw
the dust in my eyes, and then catch me when I'm blinded. If the
vestals had not turned up their thumbs I should have been a dead
man.
CAESAR (halting on the stair) There is nothing in the rules
against it.
SECUTOR (indignantly) Caesar: is it a dirty trick or is it not?
CAESAR. It is a dusty one, my friend. (Obsequious laughter). Be
on your guard next time.
SECUTOR. Let HIM be on his guard. Next time I'll throw my sword
at his heels and strangle him with his own net before he can hop
off. (To Retiarius) You see if I don't. (He goes out past the
gladiators, sulky and furious).
CAESAR (to the chuckling Retiarius). These tricks are not wise,
my friend. The audience likes to see a dead man in all his beauty
and splendor. If you smudge his face and spoil his armor they
will show their displeasure by not letting you kill him. And when
your turn comes, they will remember it against you and turn their
thumbs down.
THE RETIARIUS. Perhaps that is why I did it, Caesar. He bet me
ten sesterces that he would vanquish me. If I had had to kill
him I should not have had the money.
CAESAR (indulgent, laughing) You rogues: there is no end to your
tricks. I'll dismiss you all and have elephants to fight. They
fight fairly. (He goes up to his box, and knocks at it. It is
opened from within by the Captain, who stands as on parade to let
him pass). The Call Boy comes from the passage, followed by
three attendants carrying respectively a bundle of swords, some
helmets, and some breastplates and pieces of armor which they
throw down in a heap.
THE CALL BOY. By your leave, Caesar. Number eleven! Gladiators
and Christians!
Ferrovius springs up, ready for martyrdom. The other Christians
take the summons as best they can, some joyful and brave, some
patient and dignified, some tearful and helpless, some embracing
one another with emotion. The Call Boy goes back into the
passage.
CAESAR (turning at the door of the box) The hour has come,
Ferrovius. I shall go into my box and see you killed, since you
scorn the Pretorian Guard. (He goes into the box. The Captain
shuts the door, remaining inside with the Emperor. Metellus and
the rest of the suite disperse to their seats. The Christians,
led by Ferrovius, move towards the passage).
LAVINIA (to Ferrovius) Farewell.
THE EDITOR. Steady there. You Christians have got to fight. Here!
arm yourselves.
FERROVIUS (picking up a sword) I'll die sword in hand to show
people that I could fight if it were my Master's will, and that I
could kill the man who kills me if I chose.
THE EDITOR. Put on that armor.
FERROVIUS. No armor.
THE EDITOR (bullying him) Do what you're told. Put on that armor.
FERROVIUS (gripping the sword and looking dangerous) I said, No
armor.
THE EDITOR. And what am I to say when I am accused of sending a
naked man in to fight my men in armor?
FERROVIUS. Say your prayers, brother; and have no fear of the
princes of this world.
THE EDITOR. Tsha! You obstinate fool! (He bites his lips
irresolutely, not knowing exactly what to do).
ANDROCLES (to Ferrovius) Farewell, brother, till we meet in the
sweet by-and-by.
THE EDITOR (to Androcles) You are going too. Take a sword there;
and put on any armor you can find to fit you.
ANDROCLES. No, really: I can't fight: I never could. I can't
bring myself to dislike anyone enough. I'm to be thrown to the
lions with the lady.
THE EDITOR. Then get out of the way and hold your noise.
(Androcles steps aside with cheerful docility). Now then! Are you
all ready there? A trumpet is heard from the arena.
FERROVIUS (starting convulsively) Heaven give me strength!
THE EDITOR. Aha! That frightens you, does it?
FERROVIUS. Man: there is no terror like the terror of that sound
to me. When I hear a trumpet or a drum or the clash of steel or
the hum of the catapult as the great stone flies, fire runs
through my veins: I feel my blood surge up hot behind my eyes: I
must charge: I must strike: I must conquer: Caesar himself will
not be safe in his imperial seat if once that spirit gets loose
in me. Oh, brothers, pray! exhort me! remind me that if I raise
my sword my honor falls and my Master is crucified afresh.
ANDROCLES. Just keep thinking how cruelly you might hurt the poor
gladiators.
FERROVIUS. It does not hurt a man to kill him.
LAVINIA. Nothing but faith can save you.
FERROVIUS. Faith! Which faith? There are two faiths. There is our
faith. And there is the warrior's faith, the faith in fighting,
the faith that sees God in the sword. How if that faith should
overwhelm me?
LAVINIA. You will find your real faith in the hour of trial.
FERROVIUS. That is what I fear. I know that I am a fighter. How
can I feel sure that I am a Christian?
ANDROCLES. Throw away the sword, brother.
FERROVIUS. I cannot. It cleaves to my hand. I could as easily
throw a woman I loved from my arms. (Starting) Who spoke that
blasphemy? Not I.
LAVINIA. I can't help you, friend. I can't tell you not to save
your own life. Something wilful in me wants to see you fight your
way into heaven.
FERROVIUS. Ha!
ANDROCLES. But if you are going to give up our faith, brother,
why not do it without hurting anybody? Don't fight them. Burn the
incense.
FERROVIUS. Burn the incense! Never.
LAVINIA. That is only pride, Ferrovius.
FERROVIUS. ONLY pride! What is nobler than pride? (Conscience
stricken) Oh, I'm steeped in sin. I'm proud of my pride.
LAVINIA. They say we Christians are the proudest devils on earth
--that only the weak are meek. Oh, I am worse than you. I ought
to send you to death; and I am tempting you.
ANDROCLES. Brother, brother: let THEM rage and kill: let US be
brave and suffer. You must go as a lamb to the slaughter.
FERROVIUS. Aye, aye: that is right. Not as a lamb is slain by the
butcher; but as a butcher might let himself be slain by a
(looking at the Editor) by a silly ram whose head he could fetch
off in one twist.
Before the Editor can retort, the Call Boy rushes up through the
passage; and the Captain comes from the Emperor's box and
descends the steps.
THE CALL BOY. In with you: into the arena. The stage is waiting.
THE CAPTAIN. The Emperor is waiting. (To the Editor) What are you
dreaming of, man? Send your men in at once.
THE EDITOR. Yes, Sir: it's these Christians hanging back.
FERROVIUS (in a voice of thunder) Liar!
THE EDITOR (not heeding him) March. (The gladiators told off to
fight with the Christians march down the passage) Follow up
there, you.
THE CHRISTIAN MEN AND WOMEN (as they part) Be steadfast, brother.
Farewell. Hold up the faith, brother. Farewell. Go to glory,
dearest. Farewell. Remember: we are praying for you. Farewell. Be
strong, brother. Farewell. Don't forget that the divine love and
our love surround you. Farewell. Nothing can hurt you: remember
that, brother. Farewell. Eternal glory, dearest. Farewell.
THE EDITOR (out of patience) Shove them in, there.
The remaining gladiators and the Call Boy make a movement towards
them.
FERROVIUS (interposing) Touch them, dogs; and we die here, and
cheat the heathen of their spectacle. (To his fellow Christians)
Brothers: the great moment has come. That passage is your hill to
Calvary. Mount it bravely, but meekly; and remember! not a word
of reproach, not a blow nor a struggle. Go. (They go out through
the passage. He turns to Lavinia) Farewell.
LAVINIA. You forget: I must follow before you are cold.
FERROVIUS. It is true. Do not envy me because I pass before you
to glory. (He goes through the passage).
THE EDITOR (to the Call Boy) Sickening work, this. Why can't they
all be thrown to the lions? It's not a man's job. (He throws
himself moodily into his chair).
The remaining gladiators go back to their former places
indifferently. The Call Boy shrugs his shoulders and squats down
at the entrance to the passage, near the Editor.
Lavinia and the Christian women sit down again, wrung with grief,
some weeping silently, some praying, some calm and steadfast.
Androcles sits down at Lavinia's feet. The Captain stands on the
stairs, watching her curiously.
ANDROCLES. I'm glad I haven't to fight. That would really be an
awful martyrdom. I AM lucky.
LAVINIA (looking at him with a pang of remorse). Androcles: burn
the incense: you'll be forgiven. Let my death atone for both. I
feel as if I were killing you.
ANDROCLES. Don't think of me, sister. Think of yourself. That
will keep your heart up.
The Captain laughs sardonically.
LAVINIA (startled: she had forgotten his presence) Are you there,
handsome Captain? Have you come to see me die?
THE CAPTAIN (coming to her side) I am on duty with the Emperor,
Lavinia.
LAVINIA. Is it part of your duty to laugh at us?
THE CAPTAIN. No: that is part of my private pleasure. Your friend
here is a humorist. I laughed at his telling you to think of
yourself to keep up your heart. I say, think of yourself and burn
the incense.
LAVINIA. He is not a humorist: he was right. You ought to know
that, Captain: you have been face to face with death.
THE CAPTAIN. Not with certain death, Lavinia. Only death in
battle, which spares more men than death in bed. What you are
facing is certain death. You have nothing left now but your faith
in this craze of yours: this Christianity. Are your Christian
fairy stories any truer than our stories about Jupiter and Diana,
in which, I may tell you, I believe no more than the Emperor
does, or any educated man in Rome?
LAVINIA. Captain: all that seems nothing to me now. I'll not say
that death is a terrible thing; but I will say that it is so real
a thing that when it comes close, all the imaginary things--all
the stories, as you call them--fade into mere dreams beside that
inexorable reality. I know now that I am not dying for stories or
dreams. Did you hear of the dreadful thing that happened here
while we were waiting?
THE CAPTAIN. I heard that one of your fellows bolted,, and ran
right into the jaws of the lion. I laughed. I still laugh.
LAVINIA. Then you don't understand what that meant?
THE CAPTAIN. It meant that the lion had a cur for his breakfast.
LAVINIA. It meant more than that, Captain. It meant that a man
cannot die for a story and a dream. None of us believed the
stories and the dreams more devoutly than poor Spintho; but he
could not face the great reality. What he would have called my
faith has been oozing away minute by minute whilst I've been
sitting here, with death coming nearer and nearer, with reality
becoming realler and realler, with stories and dreams fading away
into nothing.
THE CAPTAIN. Are you then going to die for nothing?
LAVINIA. Yes: that is the wonderful thing. It is since all the
stories and dreams have gone that I have now no doubt at all that
I must die for something greater than dreams or stories.
THE CAPTAIN. But for what?
LAVINIA. I don't know. If it were for anything small enough to
know, it would be too small to die for. I think I'm going to die
for God. Nothing else is real enough to die for.
THE CAPTAIN. What is God?
LAVINIA. When we know that, Captain, we shall be gods ourselves.
THE CAPTAIN. Lavinia; come down to earth. Burn the incense and
marry me.
LAVINIA. Handsome Captain: would you marry me if I hauled down
the flag in the day of battle and burnt the incense? Sons take
after their mothers, you know. Do you want your son to be a
coward?
THE CAPTAIN (strongly moved). By great Diana, I think I would
strangle you if you gave in now.
LAVINIA (putting her hand on the head of Androcles) The hand of
God is on us three, Captain.
THE CAPTAIN. What nonsense it all is! And what a monstrous thing
that you should die for such nonsense, and that I should look on
helplessly when my whole soul cries out against it! Die then if
you must; but at least I can cut the Emperor's throat and then my
own when I see your blood.
The Emperor throws open the door of his box angrily, and appears
in wrath on the threshold. The Editor, the Call Boy, and the
gladiators spring to their feet.
THE EMPEROR. The Christians will not fight; and your curs cannot
get their blood up to attack them. It's all that fellow with the
blazing eyes. Send for the whip. (The Call Boy rushes out on the
east side for the whip). If that will not move them, bring the
hot irons. The man is like a mountain. (He returns angrily into
the box and slams the door).
The Call Boy returns with a man in a hideous Etruscan mask,
carrying a whip. They both rush down the passage into the arena.
LAVINIA (rising) Oh, that is unworthy. Can they not kill him
without dishonoring him?
ANDROCLES (scrambling to his feet and running into the middle of
the space between the staircases) It's dreadful. Now I want to
fight. I can't bear the sight of a whip. The only time I ever hit
a man was when he lashed an old horse with a whip. It was
terrible: I danced on his face when he was on the ground. He
mustn't strike Ferrovius: I'll go into the arena and kill him
first. (He makes a wild dash into the passage. As he does so a
great clamor is heard from the arena, ending in wild
applause. The gladiators listen and look inquiringly at one
another).
THE EDITOR. What's up now?
LAVINIA (to the Captain) What has happened, do you think?
THE CAPTAIN. What CAN happen? They are killing them, I suppose.
ANDROCLES (running in through the passage, screaming with horror
and hiding his eyes)!!!
LAVINIA. Androcles, Androcles: what's the matter?
ANDROCLES. Oh, don't ask me, don't ask me. Something too
dreadful. Oh! (He crouches by her and hides his face in her robe,
sobbing).
THE CALL Boy (rushing through from the passage as before) Ropes
and hooks there! Ropes and hooks.
THE EDITOR. Well, need you excite yourself about it? (Another
burst of applause).
Two slaves in Etruscan masks, with ropes and drag hooks, hurry
in.
ONE OF THE SLAVES. How many dead?
THE CALL Boy. Six. (The slave blows a whistle twice; and four
more masked slaves rush through into the arena with the same
apparatus) And the basket. Bring the baskets. (The slave whistles
three times, and runs through the passage with his companion).
THE CAPTAIN. Who are the baskets for?
THE CALL Boy. For the whip. He's in pieces. They're all in
pieces, more or less. (Lavinia hides her face).
(Two more masked slaves come in with a basket and follow the
others into the arena, as the Call Boy turns to the gladiators
and exclaims, exhausted) Boys, he's killed the lot.
THE EMPEROR (again bursting from his box, this time in an ecstasy
of delight) Where is he? Magnificent! He shall have a laurel
crown.
Ferrovius, madly waving his bloodstained sword, rushes through
the passage in despair, followed by his co-religionists, and by
the menagerie keeper, who goes to the gladiators. The gladiators
draw their swords nervously.
FERROVIUs. Lost! lost forever! I have betrayed my Master. Cut off
this right hand: it has offended. Ye have swords, my brethren:
strike.
LAVINIA. No, no. What have you done, Ferrovius?
FERROVIUS. I know not; but there was blood behind my eyes; and
there's blood on my sword. What does that mean?
THE EMPEROR (enthusiastically, on the landing outside his box)
What does it mean? It means that you are the greatest man in
Rome. It means that you shall have a laurel crown of gold. Superb
fighter, I could almost yield you my throne. It is a record for
my reign: I shall live in history. Once, in Domitian's time, a
Gaul slew three men in the arena and gained his freedom. But when
before has one naked man slain six armed men of the bravest and
best? The persecution shall cease: if Christians can fight like
this, I shall have none but Christians to fight for me. (To the
Gladiators) You are ordered to become Christians, you there: do
you hear?
RETIARIUS. It is all one to us, Caesar. Had I been there with my
net, the story would have been different.
THE CAPTAIN (suddenly seizing Lavinia by the wrist and dragging
her up the steps to the Emperor) Caesar this woman is the sister
of Ferrovius. If she is thrown to the lions he will fret. He will
lose weight; get out of condition
THE EMPEROR. The lions? Nonsense! (To Lavinia) Madam: I am proud
to have the honor of making your acquaintance. Your brother is
the glory of Rome.
LAVINIA. But my friends here. Must they die?
THE EMPEROR. Die! Certainly not. There has never been the
slightest idea of harming them. Ladies and gentlemen: you are all
free. Pray go into the front of the house and enjoy the spectacle
to which your brother has so splendidly contributed. Captain:
oblige me by conducting them to the seats reserved for my
personal friends.
THE MENAGERIE KEEPER. Caesar: I must have one Christian for the
lion. The people have been promised it; and they will tear the
decorations to bits if they are disappointed.
THE EMPEROR. True, true: we must have somebody for the new lion.
FERROVIUS. Throw me to him. Let the apostate perish.
THE EMPEROR. No, no: you would tear him in pieces, my friend; and
we cannot afford to throw away lions as if they were mere slaves.
But we must have somebody. This is really extremely awkward.
THE MENAGERIE KEEPER. Why not that little Greek chap? He's not a
Christian: he's a sorcerer.
THE EMPEROR. The very thing: he will do very well.
THE CALL Boy (issuing from the passage) Number twelve. The
Christian for the new lion.
ANDROCLES (rising, and pulling himself sadly together) Well, it
was to be, after all.
LAVINIA. I'll go in his place, Caesar. Ask the Captain whether
they do not like best to see a woman torn to pieces. He told me
so yesterday.
THE EMPEROR. There is something in that: there is certainly
something in that--if only I could feel sure that your brother
would not fret.
ANDROCLES. No: I should never have another happy hour. No: on the
faith of a Christian and the honor of a tailor, I accept the lot
that has fallen on me. If my wife turns up, give her my love and
say that my wish was that she should be happy with her next, poor
fellow! Caesar: go to your box and see how a tailor can die. Make
way for number twelve there. (He marches out along the passage).
The vast audience in the amphitheatre now sees the Emperor
re-enter his box and take his place as Androcles, desperately
frightened, but still marching with piteous devotion, emerges
from the other end of the passage, and finds himself at the focus
of thousands of eager eyes. The lion's cage, with a heavy
portcullis grating, is on his left. The Emperor gives a signal. A
gong sounds. Androcles shivers at the sound; then falls on his
knees and prays.
The grating rises with a clash. The lion bounds into the arena.
He rushes round frisking in his freedom. He sees Androcles. He
stops; rises stiffly by straightening his legs; stretches out his
nose forward and his tail in a horizontal line behind, like a
pointer, and utters an appalling roar. Androcles crouches and
hides his face in his hands. The lion gathers himself for a
spring, swishing his tail to and fro through the dust in an
ecstasy of anticipation. Androcles throws up his hands in
supplication to heaven. The lion checks at the sight of
Androcles's face. He then steals towards him; smells him; arches
his back; purrs like a motor car; finally rubs himself against
Androcles, knocking him over. Androcles, supporting himself on
his wrist, looks affrightedly at the lion. The lion limps on
three paws, holding up the other as if it was wounded. A flash of
recognition lights up the face of Androcles. He flaps his hand as
if it had a thorn in it, and pretends to pull the thorn out and
to hurt himself. The lion nods repeatedly. Androcles holds out
his hands to the lion, who gives him both paws, which
he shakes with enthusiasm. They embrace rapturously, finally
waltz round the arena amid a sudden burst of deafening applause,
and out through the passage, the Emperor watching them in
breathless astonishment until they disappear, when he rushes from
his box and descends the steps in frantic excitement.
THE EMPEROR. My friends, an incredible! an amazing thing! has
happened. I can no longer doubt the truth of Christianity. (The
Christians press to him joyfully) This Christian sorcerer--(with
a yell, he breaks off as he sees Androcles and the lion emerge
from the passage, waltzing. He bolts wildly up the steps into his
box, and slams the door. All, Christians and gladiators' alike,
fly for their lives, the gladiators bolting into the arena, the
others in all directions. The place is emptied with magical
suddenness).
ANDROCLES (naively) Now I wonder why they all run away from us
like that. (The lion combining a series of yawns, purrs, and
roars, achieves something very like a laugh).
THE EMPEROR (standing on a chair inside his box and looking over
the wall) Sorcerer: I command you to put that lion to death
instantly. It is guilty of high treason. Your conduct is most
disgra-- (the lion charges at him up the stairs) help! (He
disappears. The lion rears against the box; looks over the
partition at him, and roars. The Emperor darts out through the
door and down to Androcles, pursued by the lion.)
ANDROCLES. Don't run away, sir: he can't help springing if you
run. (He seizes the Emperor and gets between him and the lion,
who stops at once). Don't be afraid of him.
THE EMPEROR. I am NOT afraid of him. (The lion crouches,
growling. The Emperor clutches Androcles) Keep between us.
ANDROCLES. Never be afraid of animals, your Worship: that's the
great secret. He'll be as gentle as a lamb when he knows that you
are his friend. Stand quite still; and smile; and let him smell
you all over just to reassure him; for, you see, he's afraid of
you; and he must examine you thoroughly before he gives you his
confidence. (To the lion) Come now, Tommy; and speak nicely to
the Emperor, the great, good Emperor who has power to have all
our heads cut off if we don't behave very, VERY respectfully to
him.
The lion utters a fearful roar. The Emperor dashes madly up the
steps, across the landing, and down again on the other side, with
the lion in hot pursuit. Androcles rushes after the lion;
overtakes him as he is descending; and throws himself on his
back, trying to use his toes as a brake. Before he can stop him
the lion gets hold of the trailing end of the Emperor's robe.